In The Darkest Days by LadyBrooke

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Chapter 1

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Celeborn picked up the bucket he had filled with ice from lake, readying himself to carry it back to the fires in the middle of the camp so it could be melted for fresh water.

It had been a long year. Winter was setting in around them, and there was no sign of anyone returning from Valinor. Every few weeks, he watched as his grandfather disappeared into the forest, looking for some sign of their return. His grandfather never found anything to give him hope, only more despair.

He heard shrieks from behind him and braced himself as he turned so he would not drop the ice.

“Celeborn! Celeborn!”

“Yes, Indis?”  

“You must come quickly!” she exclaimed, as she tried to keep from slipping. “There’s something in the bushes, and it’s crying. What if it hurt itself and needs help?”

There was probably nothing he could do to help it.

With the three gone to Valinor, Olwë had decided it was too dangerous for people to explore outside of the camp’s boundaries. The amount of food and herbs there was available nearby was decreasing, but his great-uncle claimed they would be able to ration it through the winter.

His grandfather had disregarded these instructions, but he would not be back for a few days at the earliest and until he arrived there would be nothing new. And Celeborn could not venture out with him to look, for Indis had been left in his charge as one of the few old enough to look after her but without other responsibilities to keep him from doing so.

He had no heart to tell her there was nothing he could do, however.

“Hush, I shall go check on it. But you must go stay with my brother until I return,” he ordered.

“But I want to go with you,” she pouted.

“I know you do, but I need you to stay with him. What would he do with you here to advise him on the correct way to court his love?” Celeborn tried to distract her from wanting to go.

Clearly torn, she finally answered. “Fine, but you must come to me as soon as you find it and bring it back, understood?”

Inwardly amused at the way she was trying to order him around, he nodded. “I promise you that I will. Now you go find my brother so that I may go searching.”

She reached up and hugged him once before darting off. He allowed himself to smile before making his way towards the edge of the camp, hoping he would find whatever was in the bushes quickly.  

---

 

Several hours later, he was almost ready to give up in his search. He had yet to hear a single cry, hinting that whatever Indis had heard was now dead. Suddenly, he saw something lying half way out of the bushes ahead of him.

On closer examination, he saw that it was a hand outreached, still in position to continue clawing at the ground as though trying to drag itself closer to the camp. It was a horrific sight that made him want to throw up, and yet he knew that he couldn’t afford to do so. Approaching the body, he pulled it out of the bushes, wishing immediately that he hadn’t done so.  It was clearly far too late. At first glance, he was unable to even tell what it had been. The legs were crushed and mangled, hair was completely soaked with blood making even the color unrecognizable, and its mouth was opened as though to continue screaming.

Gathering his courage, Celeborn turned the body over. From this angle, he could finally see that it had been a female elf, though he doubted anybody would ever know for sure who she had really been. It would be no use to drag the body back to camp, only to upset the many people living there who had lost family who had wandered into the woods. He would simply have to bury her deeply out here; unable to even mark the grave out of fear that something would dig her back up.

He dug swiftly, not wanting to become prey to the things that stalked through the forest. When at last he had managed to place her in a deep grave and cover the body back up, he began to turn and make his way back, thinking of what he would tell Indis. Before he had moved away, he heard a noise behind him.

Tensing, he turned around, hoping that he would be able to outrun whatever it was. It seemed to be coming from the bushes.

Mumbling to himself about what a fool he was to search the same bushes that he had just pulled a dead elf from, when it could be the same thing that killed her hiding, he knelt down.

At first, the only thing he saw was an embroidered blanket, covered with images of what he thought were jewels. For the third time, he heard the noise, and realized that it was coming from the blanket. Reaching to pick it up, he revealed an infant lying under it, who began to cry when it realized that this was a stranger and not somebody they knew.

Quickly grabbing the child off the ground, Celeborn  tried to make it hush. “Be quiet, please. If you continue crying, something will find us. That is unlikely to end well for you and me. Shush.”

The infant refused to quiet, no matter what he tried.

Finally, he got the idea to wrap them in the blanket once more, hoping they would be comforted at least a little.

Immediately, the infant quieted down, causing Celeborn to blink in shock. “Really? All I had to do was wrap you in a blanket to get you to be quiet? Well, I guess I’ll just keep you in there until we get back to the camp.”

When he reached the edge of the camp, he was greeted by Indis’s tear-streaked face. “Oh, Celeborn, I’m sorry.”

Shifting so that he was holding the baby in one arm, he knelt down and wrapped his other arm around her. “What do you have to be sorry for? I’ve returned in one piece, and I even found the source of the crying you heard.” As he spoke, he suppressed the urge to shudder at the thought that she had possibly instead heard the cries of the dead woman.

Indis continued to cry. “I didn’t realize that Olwë would be angry at you. He came by while I was talking to Galathil, and when he asked where you were, I told him. He said that you were endangering the entire camp and you had no business searching for another stray to bring back to camp to take care of.”

“Look at me,” Celeborn said, waiting until she was looking at him before continuing onwards. “Olwë is wrong. It was the right thing to go out there and look, and I will tell him that. But you must be brave, because I doubt he is going to react well. I need you to go wait for me in your bed, okay? I’ll be there in a little while, and I’ll tell you a story before you go to sleep.”

“But-”, Indis sniffled.

“No buts. Go to bed, and I’ll be there as soon as I talk to my Uncle.” Looking over her shoulder, he saw Olwë striding towards them, an angry look on his face. “Go, Indis.”

She looked over her shoulder and nodded, before running off, disappearing behind a building just as Olwë reached him.

“What did you think you were doing? You know the rules, and you know why they are there,” Olwë scowled at him.

“I thought that I was helping someone! Something you wouldn’t know much about, would you? Great Olwë, who wants to be a King, and thinks that just because Elu is gone to Valinor, and Finwë and  Ingwë with him, Olwë will rule everyone,” Celeborn muttered the third sentence, eyes flashing.

“Helping? Celeborn, the rules are in place because they are supposed to tell you to stop trying to help everything. The needs of one being cannot allow us all to die,” Olwë spoke.

“And who are you to decide who should die and who should live? You might be in charge, but you are not my King. And you never will be.” He turned to walk towards his house. “Now, if you will excuse me, I have an infant that just lost their mother and needs help.”

Olwe grabbed his arm and turned him around, still scowling. “You can keep them. But the next time, remember it is not your place to go rescue every little thing, or else we will soon run out of everything.”

“We already are, thanks to your policy of not allowing anybody to go outside of your predefined borders,” he snapped. “Now, I am going to take care of this infant. You can go ignore your family again, while showing yourself to be obsessed with nothing more than power.”

“I am trying to keep as many of us alive as I can!”  Olwë argued. Celeborn ignored him again as he began to move towards his hut.

---

 

It would be many years before the grand dwellings of the elves, in Middle-earth or in Valinor were completed. At this point in time, they still lived around the shores of the lake were the first elves had awoken, though they had changed from sleeping on the shores to dwelling within simple buildings made of mud and sticks.

It was into one of these buildings that Celeborn carried the infant, ducking through the front door and then lifting a curtain to enter a small bedroom. Indis sat where he had told her to, still crying.

Sighing, he went and sat on the bed with her. “Regardless of what Olwë says, you did the right thing to ask me to go search through the bushes. If you had not, this child probably would have starved to death out there, if nothing found them and killed them first.”

Indis stopped crying, though she continued to frown. “Them? Don’t you know whether they’re a boy or a girl yet?”

Celeborn laughed, “I haven’t had the opportunity to check what it is yet. Would you like to see?”

She nodded frantically, and Celeborn could not stop himself from laughing. “Very well, we’ll see what they are.”

Taking the blanket off of it, he watched as the infant stared around the room, apparently amused by the way that Indis’ hair went up and down. Looking down at it, he murmured, “I hope you are old enough to eat solids, or we might have a problem.” Finally, he managed to undo the knots that held its clothes on. He looked at it and sighed. “Apparently, I am to be outnumbered by girls in my own house.”  

Indis squealed. “You mean I will have another girl to play with?”

“Yes, you can play with Míriel as soon as she’s big enough,” Celeborn sighed, suddenly tired.

“Míriel?” Indis asked, staring at him. “If you knew her name, how did you not know she was a girl?”

“I didn’t know her name, but we can hardly continue to call her, her, girl, she, etc,” he stated.

“Why Míriel though? She doesn’t have any jewels,” Indis argued.

“The blanket has some embroidered, and it’s not that bad a name,” Celeborn argued back.

Indis looked at the blanket, “I think those are flowers.”

“Jewels.”

“Flowers.”

“Whether they’re jewels or flowers, we are going to call her Míriel. Now, is there any of that apple sauce left? And have you had anything to eat?” Celeborn spoke wearily, causing Indis to glare at him.

“You should have told me you were tired! We have some of the apple sauce left, and yes, I ate.”

“Do you want a bit of apple sauce? I’m going to see if I can get Miriel to eat any of it, and then we can all go to bed,” he offered.

She shook her head. “I’m not hungry. You should eat after you feed her though.”

He smiled. “I will. Do you want to stay up or go to bed?”

“Go to bed. Can Miriel sleep in my room when she’s older?” Indis pleaded.

“Yes, she can, assuming your brother isn’t back by then,” Celeborn said.  

“Do we have to talk about him now? He left.” Indis pouted, causing Celeborn to sigh.

“No, we don’t. But we will have a discussion later. When your brother returns, he will want to see you.”

“But what if I don’t want to see him?” Indis pouted more.

“We will deal with that when he returns,” Celeborn stated. “Now, into bed, so I can tell you your story and go feed Miriel.”

After he finished the story, he watched as Indis turned onto her side and grasped her doll. He would miss her when she had to leave and go with Ingwë.

~

Throughout the night, Celeborn was unable to rest. While he was exhausted, both physically and mentally, he kept remembering the events of the day.

The closer he came to sleep, the less it was a memory, and the more it was a nightmare. The body changed from the woman he had found to his father and then to those that were not dead, taunting him, telling him that they too would die one day and there was nothing he could do to save them. Finally, after seeing his Grandfather lying on the ground, broken and screaming, he decided to put off rest until the memory had retreated.

He sat at the table, staring at the wall and listening in case Míriel cried out until Indis woke up.

“What do you want for breakfast?”

Indis stared at him. “You didn’t go to bed.”

“Yes, I did,” Celeborn said. “And that is not an answer to my question.”

“No, you didn’t. You look more tired than you did last night.”

Celeborn wondered what Ingwë would think when he returned and his sister was more stubborn than half of the rest of the camp combined. Hopefully he was just as ill-prepared to answer her interrogations as Celeborn was. “I did go to bed, I just did not sleep well. But you still need to answer my question.”

“Apples,” Indis said. “You should stay here today and rest. You’ll get hurt if you keep going out when you’re tired like this.”

“You are going to turn into an apple,” Celeborn muttered, handing her the bowl of apples. “And I have to go look for food today, or we won’t have enough food to get through the month, let alone the winter.”

“You’re the one that said the apples will go bad soon if we don’t eat or dry them, so I’m eating the ones we didn’t dry. Will you please stay here today?”

“I can’t,” he said. “Especially with Míriel now living with us, we need food. Now, will you please stop asking?”

Indis stared at him for a few moments longer, while Celeborn stood up and went to get Míriel. When he returned to the table, she finally nodded. “I don’t agree with you not resting, but I accept it. Give Míriel to me, I can feed her.”

Celeborn handed Míriel over. “Make sure you hold her head up.”

“I know what to do with babies. She’s not the first one I’ve ever seen.” Indis rolled her eyes. “Don’t you have other things to do? I’ll come get you around camp if we need any help.”

“I’ll send my brother to check on you,” Celeborn said. “But yes, I do. Promise me you’ll yell for help if you need it.”

“I promise.” Indis continued to feed Míriel. “At least she’s old enough to eat solids.”

“At least there’s that,” he agreed.

Celeborn finally forced himself to leave, stepping through the doorway into the cold. The chill seemed to seep into everything, and he hoped the clouds would at least stop covering the stars soon so he could see without a torch.

He finally made his way to the other side of their settlement, carefully skirting the edges of the camp and trying not to stare out into the darkness. When he reached his work, Olwë was standing in front of the pile of wood.

“Celeborn,” Olwë said.

“Uncle.” Celeborn stood straighter, jaw clenched. “How can I help you this morning?”

Olwë looked out into the darkness and was quiet. Celeborn began to chop the wood, waiting patiently. However much he wanted to continue the argument from yesterday, he couldn’t lose his temper again. There was too much to lose.

“I wanted to apologize.” Olwë broke the silence, still looking out into the dark woods.

“Why?” Celeborn knew as soon as he said it that wasn’t the brightest way to have phrased it, and looked over, expecting Olwë to be glaring.

Olwë’s lips were quirked upwards. “You’re so much like my brothers, you know. Temperamental, prone to flights of fancy to do what you think is right… I worry, sometimes, that you will end up the same way both of them have.”

“What do you mean?” Celeborn asked.

“Elu has gone to Valinor, in search of a perfect land where we can all live in peace. But if something goes wrong, he, Finwë, and Ingwë are gone forever,” Olwë said. “And your grandfather… I love him. I love both of my brothers, but they both take off on adventures without telling anyone where they are going, or if they do say where they are going, they don’t tell anyone how they are getting there. If your grandfather is lost in these woods, I do not know where to begin looking for him.”

“They will find their way back,” Celeborn said, looking into the woods himself. “They have to.”

“I hope they do.” Olwë finally turned from the woods. “And you, Celeborn, reminded me far too much of your grandfather yesterday.”

“I couldn’t just ignore her,” Celeborn said.

“No, you couldn’t.” Olwë sighed. “I can admit that you did the right thing to go out and find her – though it was dangerous. I know you didn’t end up covered in that much dirt just from finding her, because there was none on her.”

Celeborn flushed.

“I assume there was another elf with her that you ended up having to bury,” Olwë said. “We’ve had to bury too many elves these past few years, and I would rather not add you to the list.”

“I will try to stay out of danger,” Celeborn said.

“I know you can’t always stay out of danger. I’m not a fool or completely unreasonable, no matter how much you and my brother think I am.” Celeborn looked up at him, and Olwë laughed. “Yes, I’m well aware of what he says about me. He says it to me sometimes, so I would have to be deaf not to know.”

Celeborn nodded, but didn’t say anything.

“I will be content if you tell somebody where you are going before you leave. It doesn’t even have to be me, if you think I will forbid you. Tell your brother, tell Beleg, tell anyone in this camp. Just don’t make us all wonder where you went in the woods, and especially don’t make me interrogate Indis to find out where you are.” Olwë reached out and grabbed Celeborn’s shoulder. “I’ve already lost too much of my family, and I don’t want to add you to the list as well.”

“I understand,” Celeborn said. “I’ll tell someone next time.”

“See that you do,” Olwë said. “I have to go see some of the others now. Keep an ear and an eye open today.”

“Do you think something is going to happen?” Celeborn said, looking back into the woods.

Olwë looked back as well.  “I do not know. Beleg found a wolf wandering around his house a few hours ago, and some of the others have reported sounds coming from the woods.”

“Howls?”

“Orcs. Crying out in the distance,” Olwë tightened his grip on Celeborn’s shoulder before releasing his hold. “Do not try and fight them if they come closer. Get back to the center of camp as quickly as you can, and alert anyone you see on the way. If they’re coming this close, they’re desperate.”

Celeborn shuddered. “I will.”

“Good.”

Olwë turned and walked away. Celeborn began to chop the wood again, piling it next to him as he listened for anyone approaching.

He had bent over to grab another piece of wood when he heard a thud in the tree behind him. Looking up, he stumbled backwards. An arrow was stuck in the wood where his head had been.

He turned to run, but one of the orcs was too quick, appearing in the clearing with him. He tried to pick up his axe and fight, but only managed to block a sword from slicing into him before the handle split in half.

He backed up against the tree, so no more could sneak up behind him. The one from before was coming closer to him, and he knew he should pull out his knife or throw something at it. But its eyes were too similar to the elf he had buried the day before, and he couldn’t bring himself to. He took a breath and tried to pull out his knife, but it fell out of his grasp and hit the ground.

It came even closer, and he yelled. Maybe someone would hear and get away before more of them appeared.

It was almost on top of him. He closed his eyes and hoped that neither Olwë nor Indis would be the ones to find him.

He took a breath.

It thudded to the ground, and he opened his eyes.

His grandfather stood on the other side of the clearing, holding his bow in his hands and shaking. They both stared at the orc, before Celeborn fell to his knees and scooted closer, closing its eyes. His grandfather released a breath and moved to pull him up.

“If I had not arrived back,” Elmo trailed off, staring at the orc.

Celeborn shook his head. “But you did. It doesn’t matter, you arrived back and I’ll be more careful next time.”

“Next time I will be here with you, or I will arrange for someone else to be here,” Elmo said. “It’s too dangerous for any of us to be out on our own for no reason.”

“Olwë said something similar earlier,” Celeborn said, picking up the wood and glancing around into the woods. “We should get this back to the camp.”

His grandfather began to pick up a share of the wood, sliding it into a sack he had over his shoulder. “What did my brother say?”

“Just that he worried about you and Elu, and that I was too similar to both of you.” Celeborn looked at his grandfather, carefully avoiding glancing down at the ground. “He said he had lost too much of his family already. I think he’s worried about you and Elu.”

“He always has worried about us,” Elmo said. “I’ll speak to him about it tonight. I found something that will make him happier, at least.”

“Oh?” Celeborn finished stacking the wood and picked up what he could carry. “What did you find?”

Elmo gestured his grandson to begin walking back towards their homes and stepped behind him, still glancing around. “You’ll have to wait until we’re with Olwë and Indis.”

“Indis heard someone crying in the woods yesterday.” Celeborn looked back over his shoulder and decided it wasn’t worth trying to press his grandfather on what he had found. “There was a woman and a baby. The baby was still alive.”

“I assume you were the one to go out into the woods and find it, if Indis was the one who heard it crying?” Elmo raised an eyebrow.

Celeborn nodded. “Indis is taking care of her now. She knows to ask for help if she needs it, but nobody else has the time to take care of Míriel.”

“I’m sure they’re fine.”

Celeborn could see the fires now, everyone beginning to cook their meals outside. Olwë was sitting outside his house when they arrived.

“You’ve returned.” Olwë stood up and strode to meet them. “Did you find anything?”

Elmo nodded, and Celeborn saw Indis run up clutching Míriel. Beleg and Galathil stood up as well, and more elves stood in the shadows around the fire.

“The nightingales bring word from the other side of the mountains,” Elmo finally said.

Olwë looked at him. “What word do they bring?”

“The ones we have all waited to hear. Elu returns, and he brings with him Ingwë and Finwë and tales of the new land. We will not starve this winter waiting without word.”

The camp was silent for a moment, and then elves began to run to spread the word.

Celeborn looked at Indis. “It appears your brother will return sooner than expected.”

She smiled. “And Elu, as well.” She paused, and then looked down at Míriel and back up at him. “Will we have to go our separate ways when they return?”

Celeborn hesitated. “We will all make our way to the new lands they’ve discovered, but I don’t know if we will all go the same paths.”

“But we will not be separated forever?” She stared at him.

“I do not think so.”

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Chapter End Notes

Well, the entire backstory of how my Celeborn fits in with the inhabitants of Valinor is now here. ;p Leaving a baby with the equivalent of a ten year old wasn't the best decision ever, but he learns. Eventually. When he's not wandering around hauling wood and trying to make up for all his relatives being dead or off wandering the woods.