Today I’ll Kiss You, Tomorrow I’ll Miss You by UnicornsInSpace

Today I'll Kiss You, Tomorrow, I'll Miss You

Findë- Finrod

Anwassë – Amarië’s birth name Cuarthol invented for “the Hunt”, she will be given the epessë Amarië in one of Cuarthol’s later stories

            The forest was calm. Laurelin’s golden light filtered through and left a mosaic pattern of light on the ground, which was littered with leaves and detritus. The trees swayed in a breeze. It was cool and refreshing on his skin, and caused the mosaic to dance along the floor as the leaves moved. The underbrush rustled every so often with a squirrel, maybe a rabbit, or perhaps something bigger. They were supposed to be hunting, but with such privacy as this, all Finrod could do was sit up against a tree and let his beloved Anwassë lie in his arms.

            It was so far removed from the stifling formality of Tirion, where everything he said and did was analyzed by courtiers, and by his less kind relatives. Here was not Findaráto Ingoldo, a prince of the Ñoldor, who had to act perfectly, always be polite, and always say the right things at the right time. No. Here he was only Findë, a lover, who lived only for his beloved. Anwassë moved her head to his chest. He adjusted so she becomes more comfortable. Filled with love, and all he wants to do is sing.

            He knows she does not care what he sings- she only likes the sound of his voice, the vibrations of his chest, the lilting, rising, and falling. That it makes her feel protected. Life is hard for her, even here in Valinor, where they are supposed to be protected and safe everywhere. She is not. If only he could, he would marry her tomorrow, and keep her with him always to ensure her safety. But the court of Tirion is a wolf’s den. The courtiers would eat her alive, and he could do nothing to stop it. He knew how relentless and cruel their words were to his aunt Nerdanel upon her marriage to his uncle, and only because she was not the most traditionally beautiful elf woman alive. With his dear Anwassë, it would be much worse. A common Vanya, known by everyone else as her father’s only son. So, he gives his darling what little he can give her- a song to protect her, just for a little while, in this forest far away from all the gossips and prying eyes of the city. He moved his hand down to caress her face, and he feels something wet on his fingers. Tears, he realizes. He must know what upset her.

            “My beloved, why are you weeping?” Findë asked her kindly.

            “Forgive me,” she says.

            No, that will not do. He wants her to know she is safe with him- no need to guard her actions, no need to beg forgiveness for existing. So, he tightens his arms around her and kisses her head of glorious golden curls.

            “There is nothing to forgive.” He assures her.

            She leans up for a kiss, and he can do nothing by oblige. Here in this forest, he is free to be hers, and her to be his, without any worries or preoccupations. Someday, he hopes it will be like this always - even if it is a long way out. Until then, he will enjoy what little time they have together.