B2ME Day 28 - Letters by Erulisse

Chapter 1

A Letter Home

My Dearest Ammë –

I still live, a fact that amazes me when I think of the deaths that have surrounded me since I left your side so many yeni ago. The dead march in legions behind my eyes; their cadence is marked by the sounds of anguish and lubricated by the tracks of tears. My beloved friends and family Turukáno and Laurefindel both, were cut down when our beautiful city, Gondolin, was destroyed; destroyed so thoroughly that no wall could rise above my waist, were I to return to that valley. Soon Ulmo’s oceans will cover Beleriand - would that my memories could also be so cleansed.

Those cursed stones continued to dictate our lives. They have been the destruction of the House of Fëanor. Atar followed his oath walking into the maw of darkness. He lived in various places with my brother, finally leaving Telperinquar behind as he left Findaráto’s kingdom. Father’s blood was spilled on the floors of Elu Thingol’s courtyard, while my Uncles and he attempted, once again, to recover a Silmaril.

Only three of us still live: Macalaurë, my brother, and me. Uncles Maedhros and Macalaurë invaded the Army of the West and slew still more elves to steal the final two Silmarils. Uncle Maedhros threw himself into the flames of the earth, holding grandfather’s stone to him. Uncle Macalaurë threw his Silmaril into the ocean depths and fled. None have seen him since.

I believe, having not heard otherwise, that my brother still lives. I hope that in the future we will be able to work side-by-side again as we did when we were young before the Trees died.

I have been invited to join the court of the current High King, Ereinion Gil-galad, the son of Findekáno. He has promised me a studio and much work, for they will be building a new court. I suspect that most of my time will be spent making clear glazing for window coverings, but I hope that I will also be able to work with colored glass soon. As you know, when I get depressed, burying myself in my work can help me climb back out into the world again. It is spring here, but in my heart right now it is still winter. I hope that the work the King has promised me will allow my personal spring to arrive.

Ammë, I miss you beyond words, but I made my choice on the docks of Alqualondë. Those who I loved, those who I followed, are all in Mandos’ Halls. I suspect that I also will only return to your arms through the tender ministrations of Lord Namó.

Merinwë is waiting for me to finish this. She is returning to Valinor under the pardon of the Valar and has promised to see my letter delivered to you. And so I close this knowing that I can never say in words how very much the memory of you at the doorway to our home has given me strength over these ages. Let the knowledge of my love carry you through the dire words I have written above, and know that although my body is not with you, my heart has never left your side.

I remain your devoted daughter,
Helyanwë

Chapter End Notes

A/N - I have used the Quenyan names throughout, even though in Beleriand, Sindarin names were used. This is because her mother is in Valinor and Quenya would be her language.

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