Love and Loss in Three-Quarter Time by Erulisse

Chapter 1

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Love and Loss in Three-Quarter Time

Love and Loss in Three-Quarter Time

 

 

'The movements of friendship are like the movements of a dance,' thought Turgon, ‘a complex dance with many figures, circles, turns and twists.  When it is performed properly, it is exquisite to participate in.' 

 

Never in his dreams had Turgon imagined himself in this position.  The most difficult thing he had ever done for the sake of the friendship he held for Glorfindel was to pull back from the woman he loved so that his friend might woo her and win her.  Yet, from the time he had introduced the two of them, he had known in his heart that they were destined to be together, and he had found his own heart’s joy with his beloved Elenwë.  Today he would be a witness to the bonding ceremony of his two best friends, Glorfindel and Eilian, when they would declare their intention to share their lives and fëar.  To that purpose, he was awaiting them along with others of their friends and fellows. 

 

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How to Dance a Minuet*

 

“After the honors to audience, then partner, dancers are facing each other in the center of the floor”. 

 

I looked at Eilian, sitting at the head table, proud and full of happiness.  It was her fourth Begetting Day celebration and she was playing the princess, reveling in the attention paid to her by the audience of her friends and family.  It was at this event that I first began to see the woman that she would become – strong, independent, accomplished in her craft and with other people, with the physical beauty of her mother’s Telerin heritage mixed with that of her Fëanorian father.  I determined to become her staunch and steadfast friend, a companion for both adventure and tea parties, and a trusted confidant.  I hoped that with more exposure to each other and the maturity of greater age and experience, our friendship would mature into love. 

 

“Lead-in Figure:  Dance curving sideways to meet at back of space, then forward to middle, holding inside hands.  Man wheels partner around three-quarters, then both dance sideways to corner of space.” 

 

She was late, and rode up to the hill at a fast pace to make up for the delay.  Throwing her arms around my neck, she apologized for making me wait.  “No matter,” I said, and led her towards the blanket upon which awaited our picnic lunch and a bottle of wine.  That afternoon we discussed our families, our craft, and most importantly, the friendship that we held for each other.  We began to touch upon a possible future between the two of us, one in which we could possibly share our lives.  Although I did not ask permission to court her, I believed that my unspoken request was heard and agreed to.  I felt that we were in perfect accord. 

 

“Z Figure:  Dance sideways to other corner, then cross diagonally through middle of space, changing corners, then sideways to each other's previous corner.” 

 

At the feast, Eilian was resplendent.  Her gown sparkled, her circlet was delicate, and her feet fairly flew through the steps.  I tried to bespeak as many dances as possible from her, but she only granted me two dances.  I asked for a third, something that I felt sure she would grant me, but she declined to allow me a third dance, the public acknowledgement of a serious courting couple.  Doubt entered my mind.  Did she not feel as strongly for me as I did for her?  It disturbed me, but I pushed it to the back of my mind.  Later that evening, as I went to get goblets of wine for each of us, I introduced her to my good friend, Glorfindel.  He was gleaming, dressed in his customary white with his blond hair shining and his blue eyes sparkling.  From the corner of my eye, I saw her approach him and begin to speak to him.  When I returned, wine in hand, they were out on the dance floor together.  When the dance was complete, they returned to me, but they stayed within sight of each other for the remainder of the night. 

 

“Right-Hand Turn:  From corner, dance sideways to other corner, then diagonally to meet, taking right hands.  Turn by right hand, then dance sideways back to corner”. 

 

Within a short time it was evident that she and Glorfindel were a pair.  They were in each other’s company as often as possible.  I was still a friend to both of them, but I realized that they had a level of communication and mutual understanding that I could not aspire to.  They began to complete each other’s sentences, and there was a glow of happiness in both of their eyes that I could not miss.  Glorfindel spoke to both her father and grandfather, requesting formal permission to court her and she was introduced to his parents.  I knew I had lost the chance of winning her love and it cut me like a sharpened blade. 

 

“Z Figure:  (once or twice)” 

 

She left to pursue mastery in her craft, leaving both Glorfindel and me behind.  Twice each year we traveled to see her, and on those visits, we stayed with his extended family in Vanyamar.  One day I walked into the house while deep in thought, and ran into a young woman, knocking her to the floor.  As I helped her up, apologizing, I looked into her eyes and I was lost.  I had found my heart after all, and suddenly the sacrifice I had made by walking away from my first love did not seem such a hardship any more.  I could keep my relationship with my two best friends intact. 

 

“Left-Hand Turn:  As right-hand turn, but with left.” 

 

Elenwë was now my focus.  She and Eilian became firm friends, and since she was Glorfindel’s cousin, they already knew each other well.  The four of us were often seen together and enjoyed spending time with each other.  Over time I asked my beloved for her hand in marriage and she agreed.  After a proper waiting time we finally had our bonding ceremony in the garden of my father’s home.  My life felt fulfilled and my heart was overflowing with joy.  Glorfindel and Eilian had still not made a formal commitment, preferring instead to dance courtship's dance beneath the light of the Trees. 

 

“Z-Figure:  (once or twice)” 

 

My beloved and I were blessed with a child, a daughter.  Itarillë was the star that had come to earth to brighten our lives.  Our great joy was offset by tears and fear as we reluctantly left our home, striding towards a new life in a new land.  We had never imagined the difficulties ahead of us when we first set foot upon the Helcaraxë.  When Elenwë fell through the icy crack into the frigid water it was only the love for my daughter and the support of my friends that pulled me away from the doorway of the Halls of Mandos.  Either Glorfindel or Eilian was always with me and Itarillë.  When Eilian was struck down by sorrow at the death of her grandfather, we, in our turn helped her fëa recover from that blow.  Without assisting each other, we all would have been lost in that land of ice. 

 

“Two-Hand Turn and Ending:  From corner, dance sideways to other corner, then forward to meet.  Take two hands and turn.  Keeping hands, dance sideways to back of space, opening out to face audience at end.” 

 

Today I stand on the top platform of Gondolin in the central archway with the gold and silver trees, Glingal and Belthil, on each side of me.  I await the arrival of Glorfindel and Eilian, my friends, who will speak their words of bonding in front of me and other witnesses here in our sheltered city of refuge.  It took many years for them to rebuild their relationship after the horrors of Alqualondë and the Helcaraxë.  She labored to help build our fair city, and he to protect our people.  For too long they have sacrificed their joy for the sake of others.  Now it is finally time for them to become one fëa.   My friends mount the steps towards me, hand-in-hand, and their eyes are shining with the love that had been awakened so long ago when we had been a group of three.  As they speak the words of promise and love to each other, I have no regrets.  When I stepped away from her those many years ago, both of us had found our hearts in other directions.  They pivot away from me to face their friends standing around the plaza as sharing celebrants of their joy. 

 

“Honor audience, then partner.” 

 

I look at them standing next to each other and watch them bow and curtsy in thanks towards their audience of friends.  Then, turning towards each other, they come together in an embrace and kiss of both promise and passion.  The dance of courtship has been completed and our friendship, despite or, perhaps because of the sacrifices it was called upon to make, still survives.  I can ask for no more. 

 

 

* * * * *

 

 

*A/N  The Minuet is a dance in three-quarter time consisting of four steps in six beats (two measures) of music.  They begin and end with a sequence of honors.  The specific steps of the Minuet quoted above come from “The Colonial Music Institute™” How To Dance a Minuet, created and published September 18, 2001, © 2001, Colonial Music Institute™ (http://www.colonialmusic.org/Resource/howtoMIN.htm)

 

** At her fourth begetting day Eilian was the equivalent of 37-38 solar years of age. 

 

 

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Chapter End Notes

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