Fissure by Cirth

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Fanwork Notes

Fanwork Information

Summary:

Elrond meets his father in Valinor. He can't tell if it's what he expected or not.

Major Characters: Elrond, Eärendil

Major Relationships:

Genre: Drama

Challenges:

Rating: General

Warnings:

Chapters: 1 Word Count: 3, 452
Posted on 29 May 2013 Updated on 29 May 2013

This fanwork is complete.


Comments

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I loved this story! I think you wrote both Elrond and Earendil really well, and their discussion seemed very in character - I loved Elrond's lines, especially when he was challenging Earendil's beliefs. The writing was also very good!

I really liked this piece. The tension is built nicely at the very beginning and I particularly like how you conveyed through physical reactions the mixture of hope, nerves and sheer stubbornness Elrond feels while waiting on his father's doorstep. As for the description of the house itself it is beautiful and now I cannot stop imagining Ingwë's pompous portrait. As for the encounter itself I loved it. It manages to convey a multitude of emotions at once nicely unraveling, bit by bit, the tension built in the beginning, moreover the dialogues sound very realistic, quite a difficult feat given the subject of this fic. I kept feeling Eärendil was fighting more with the part of himself that agreed with Elrond than with his son (who is right shamelessly Fëanorian opinion). 

As for the ending is almost cathartic and the figure of Celebrían fits it perfectly with her calm and quieting presence.

Congratulations.

Wow! You write tension really well. Haha, it was almost hard to read without getting anxious myself :)

I really like the descriptions you put in of Elrond's movements and the way he notices small details. It really got accross how tense and conflicted he was feeling. 

I can't help wondering what was going through Earendil's head here, though. He seems to be trying very hard to be formal (I mean, he hasn't seen his son in 6000 years, and doesnt come and meet him at the door himself?) and is clearly nervous as well. The part where he slips up and doesn't know if Elrond likes tea or not was especially touching. Elrond's reaction (and then insistance that he does like it, even though he doesnt want any when it comes out) is even more so.

Anyway, great story! 

Sorry to write you two reviews on the same story, but I realized at work that I forgot to mention the parts I liked best in your story! 

These lines:

"I wait to feel some innate bond of kinship. I felt it with my brother. I felt it when I married Celebrían. I felt it when my children were born. I even felt it – Eru forgive me – when I grew close to Maglor."

"I clench my hands. Calm down. He's your father, he's your father, he's your father don't be angry fool youarethelordofImladrisandthisisadisgrace..."

I think they just showed so much emotion and personality and struggle. The second one was poignant, but the first was very insightful (that feelings for someone don't exist because they "should") and touching.

Also the part where he switched into loremaster mode and drops all pretenses was great :)

Again, sorry to write two reviews...I couldn't figure out how to edit my other one. This is why I shouldn't write reviews at two am...and possibly why I shouldn't be allowed on the internet at all, haha.

Anyway, I really like your story....I'll stop babbling now...