One Flesh, One Soul. Part I by FellFireFan

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Chapter 11

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Norgothrond

 

   Alone, Aegnor stood upon the grand promenade, a breath-taking sight with two cascading waterfalls adorning each side of the expansive round balcony. Tall lamps ablaze with flickering flames stood like radiant beacons, casting their warm glow upon the vast and mysterious cave that housed his brothers' magnificent dwelling. The cave itself seemed to shimmer with an ethereal lustre, evoking a sense of timeless wonder intermingled with an undercurrent of solemn uneasiness, for it was a world far removed from the comforting embrace of sunlight and all that was familiar to him.

    As the gentle roar of the fire lamps echoed through the cave, lost in his reverie, Aegnor's nervous thoughts were abruptly interrupted as a delicate glass, brimming with wine, was presented to him. A female elven servant stood before him, her features gentle and her demeanour meek. Her straight auburn hair flowed down her petite frame, accentuated by a simple golden circlet adorning her brow. With a soft smile, he accepted the glass from the silver plate in her hands and brought it to his lips, savouring the taste. The servant gracefully retreated into the shadows.

   After enjoying the taste of the velvety elixir, Aegnor's gaze descended upon the unfathomable chasm below him. His mind was consumed by the memory of his regrettable deeds at the gathering several months prior, actions that had left Finrod ominously silent ever since. 

   A lone figure approached from behind him. His long, unbound hair flowed behind, smooth as fine silk. "Only you would infiltrate my kingdom Aegnor, leaving nary a trace for my vigilant guards to pursue," Finrod's sudden, mellifluous voice shattered Aegnor's daydream as he approached.

   "I did not wish to disturb your slumber... brother, " Aegnor stammered, his eyes averted, too ashamed to meet Finrod's gaze.

  "Disturb my slumber?" Finrod repeated, his voice catching a heavy glint of irony. "Were it not for my cherished assortment of exquisite jewels that you inadvertently toppled with your clumsiness, perhaps my guards would not have been compelled to chase you through my abode, onto the rooftop, where you were promptly recognized before they discharged their arrows...perhaps I would still be slumbering," Finrod retorted, a mischievous sparkle illuminating his eyes.

  "I tried, Finrod... You did not return any of my letters!" Aegnor responded, his voice tense. Finrod chuckled softly and, striding towards a small silver casket, he brought it to Aegnor and presented it's contents to his eyes.

"Are these the letters?" He asked

The contents revealed a meticulously bound collection of nearly a hundred opened letters, bounded neatly together with a ribbon. "I have read everyone, alas! The responsibilities of ruling a kingdom leave me scant time to pen even a solitary missive these days," Finrod beamed warmly. He cast his gaze upon his youngest brother, whose sorrowful eyes remained fixated on the silver box in his grasp. A tender hand rested upon Aegnor's shoulder. "You had presumed that a chill has overtaken my affections for you. Alas! Regardless of your poor discernment. I will never forsake you,"  Smiling gently, Finrod returned the box to its place.

"I know what you will say and you will be right. I have acted as a fool," Aegnor grumbled, as a still smiling Finrod returned the box to its place. Aegnor's robust arms leaned over the flat, stone balustrade. "Once again, I brought shame upon you and our house... please forgive me Finrod, I did not mean to let you down," he muttered, his voice laced with fragility. His head sank low, consumed by a flood of remorse that coursed through his being.

 Finrod poured himself a glass and joined his brother, standing close beside him. He took a long thoughtful sip and tensed his lips. His light grey eyes fixed forward. "Do you recall Aegnor, a chest of white oak? The one atar always kept locked?" Finrod asked. 

  "Yes," Aegnor replied, "none of us could open it, for the key had been lost," 

His answer caused Finrod to look at him.

  "No, Aegnor," he smiled, "Do you not remember? The key was never lost. Atar fabricated the tale of the missing key though, truth was, he had it in his possession the whole time." Finrod paused as Aegnor clung to his every word. "And so, we all fell for his ruse, and were content to admire the chest with closed minds." Finrod placed his glass down upon the balustrade, his smile drawing wider. "That was, of course, all of us... except you Aegnor."

His eyes fixed in Finrod's, Aegnor listened intently as he continued, "You were not so easily swayed and you saw straight through his deception. You alone persisted in harassing our poor atar until even his abundance in patience wore thin. Finally, he called us all to the chest. And from his clothing, he revealed the key to our eyes and opened the chest."

Aegnor, his brow furrowed and gaze intense asked  "What treasures did it hold within?" Finrod's answer came in a serene smile.

"Nothing, my brother," he replied. "It was empty. By the mere act of locking it, Atar instilled a belief within us that a great secret resided inside, and that was the lesson he sought to teach us. If we allow another to control our thoughts, we lose the agency over ourselves." A pause enveloped the air as Aegnor absorbed the weight of the moment, his mind captivated by Finrod's powerful words.

 "I do not recall this!" Aegnor whispered to himself, utterly confused.

 "You were very young then, Aegnor. Not even the tender age of child years, yet even in those earliest days, you alone stirred unrest within Atar, for he discerned the immense strength and resolve that dwelled within, a formidable power indeed. Yet, he also saw a great vulnerability that was easily exploited and swayed by the contents of a valueless chest,"  Aegnor's demeaner sank as he absorbed Finrod's message "Observing you in Hithrim, how effortlessly Celegorm inserted himself into your head and poisoned your mind, and all the raw force you exerted upon him in that moment reminded me of Atar's great concern. And I am deeply troubled for you," the intensity in Finrod's eyes gravely wounded Aegnor. Utterly ashamed, Aegnor evaded his gaze completely.

"Aegnor..." Finrod called softly, Aegnor finally looked at him, "Is there any truth to what he claimed about you... and a certain maiden?"

 Aegnor found himself trapped. He released a long, troubled sigh and thinned his lips. "I had not wished for you to learn of this in such a manner," Aegnor relented, his voice laced with a palpable sense of defeat and a faint flicker of anger. "It is true, there exists one who now holds sway over the very governance of my thoughts." He sighed deeply, turning around, his back leaning heavily against the ornate balustrade.

   "For too long have I resisted her alluring call, yet she continues to draw me ever deeper into her thrall." A tremor passed through his frame as he confessed, "In a weak moment born of my fragility, I allowed her close, her soothing touch a balm to my fiery soul. Upon her lips, I almost succumbed to an intoxicating kiss, one that now curses my every waking thought."

   Finrod received this revelation with a solemn nod, his features etched with a calm understanding. At length, he broke the weighted silence. "This maiden of whom you speak," he began slowly, a subtle tremor betraying his cautious tone. "Is she someone known to me, Aegnor? A friend whom I have had the honour of meeting before, perhaps?"

   Aegnor paused, the weight of his tumultuous emotions palpable in the hush that followed. "Your paths have crossed before," he answered at last, his voice heavy with both longing and a hint of secrecy. "But her name I am unwilling to reveal, at least for now,"

   Finrod nodded quietly, his mind searching. He knew many suitable elf-maidens, exceptional in loveliness and nobility. All of whom would make a fine match for Aegnor indeed. Yet the sheer depth of Aegnor's emotional turmoil remained a cause for grave concern, etching lines of worry upon Finrod's fair countenance.

   "She holds dominion over my every thought, as if she cradles them within the very palm of her hand, I would willingly surrender all that I possess, if only to be near her, and I tremble when I hear my name, whispered in her breath," Aegnor sank slowly to the ground, a veritable heap of anguished turmoil etched upon his fair features. "What is this overwhelming sensation that grips me? It is a torment unlike any I have ever endured!"

    Finrod lowered upon the stone floor, his long legs gracefully folded beneath him. With compassion in his gaze, he beheld Aegnor, his mind traversing the corridors of memory to a time when his own heart had been stirred by a similar emotion.

  "Does this fair maiden reciprocate the depths of your affection?" He gently prodded.

  "Without a shadow of a doubt! She would willingly surrender all for me as I would for her!" Aegnor weakly replied.

   "My brother, you have finally been touched by the call of the feä!" Finrod exclaimed, his tone beaming with jubilation. Weary yet hopeful, Aegnor lifted his gaze from the palm of his hand, his countenance a tapestry of perplexed irritation, silently yearning for further explanation

  "It is the ethereal allure that draws kindred souls together, a spiritual bond woven amongst our kin," Finrod explained, his words infused with an ethereal glow. "The marital union between the Eldar is forged in this time. The feäs, they beckon to one another, and soon the hröas follow suit. It is a force of unparalleled intensity, an exquisite power that defies explanation. A drawing for physical and emotional intimacy that is far too powerful to resist, and from what I can tell, you are already well into its advanced stages."

   "This!?" Aegnor groaned. "This is the elated elevation of supreme grandeur that has sparked the punishing lectures upon me from both you and Angrod?" His countenance unimpressed and dishevelled. Finrod nodded, his smile blossoming into a radiant grin. "Pfft! It's abhorrent, and I hate it!" He barked. Finrod chuckled softly at such a predictable response from his youngest brother.

  "It may seem inconceivable now, but in time, you shall come to appreciate its profound beauty," Finrod offered, his words imbued with an unwavering conviction. "For love, in all its manifestations, is a tapestry woven by the Valar themselves, and one day, you shall find solace within its safe embrace." He continued, gracefully lifting again.

   "How long will I feel this way? When will this contemptuous, sickening feeling subside!?" Aegnor's demand hung in the air, charged with raw emotion. He jumped to his feet, his eyes burning into Finrod's, his voice laced with more aggression than he had intended. Finrod couldn't help but find amusement in Aegnor's newfound misery, and a mischievous smile played on his lips.

  "From what I know, they will subside once both fëa and hröa have been satisfied...through the joining of sexual union, dawning the age of martrimony," he replied his tone light but tinged with empathy. "Alas, I too yearn for my beloved, Amarïe, and my feä and my hröa aches to be joined with her, but I have learned to live with this longing, as you will also."

   A stunned silence followed Finrod's words as Aegnor absorbed the weight of what was said. The soft glow of bioluminescent lights and flickering fire lamps cast a gentle radiance, enhancing the smooth texture of Aegnor's face. His features became bathed in an ethereal gleam, a harmonious blend of warm and cool tones that accentuated the beauty of his visage.

    Finrod took a purposeful stride toward him and placed a warm hand on his broad shoulder, his presence both comforting and commanding.  "Aegnor, my brother, I implore you, embrace this new chapter in your life. Do not resist its call, nor should you harbour fear within your heart. For the fëa, the ethereal essence deep within us seldom errors in its choice. This maiden, whoever she might be, was destined to cross your path, and soon, you shall find completeness."  With genuine warmth, Finrod's hand alighted from him. "When the ravages of war have subsided and peaceful times grace our lands once more, I shall stand proudly at your side to witness your sacred vows and welcome this new addition into our fold," he continued, his words spreading a tapestry of hope.

  A wide, elated grin unfurled upon Aegnor's countenance, his cheeks ablaze with sheer delight. In the wake of Finrod's departure to his chambers, Aegnor's merriment overflowed, and he danced with unadulterated joy upon the balcony. His lustrous hair twirled around him with every graceful step, casting a spellbinding aura. In that moment, he could scarcely recall a time when he had felt such profound happiness, and he vowed to protect it fiercely. He would never allow it to be taken from him ever again.

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Ladros

381 A.D

 

   The debate of paramount importance was held at night, casting a glow upon the large hall. The crackling firelight illuminated the faces of the attendees as raindrops pelted the wooden structure outside. Despite the raging storm, the interior of the hall remained warm and dry, providing solace from the tempestuous weather.

   Morgoth's rising power had cast a shadow of fear upon the land of Ladros, compelling the lords of the three houses of men to convene and address the growing concerns. Boromir called for a mandatory meeting to discuss the future of their people. The weight of the decision hung heavily in the air as the lords deliberated whether to stay and endure the encroaching darkness or seek a new home elsewhere. 

    Among the attendees, Aegnor, sent by Angrod as an observer, arrived cloaked in darkness, his presence unnoticed by the gathering. He silently made his way to the back of the crowd, his keen eyes scanning the hall. Amid the flickering flames, he caught sight of a raven-haired maiden standing beside her brother, who was addressing the lords. Her radiance and serenity shone through. Like a graceful lady, her gaze swept across the concerned faces in the room, each expression reflecting the weight of their worries. It was a room filled with tension and uncertainty. Her eyes moved with a quiet elegance, gliding over the worried brows and furrowed foreheads.

   Aegnor stood apart from the rest, leaning against a sturdy support pillar. His features were partially concealed by the hood that cast a shadow over his face. Strands of shimmering golden hair cascading down in a gentle coil like threads of spun gold.

    After much deliberation, the decision was reached unanimously—they would leave Ladros, forsaking their ancestral home forever. However, before the men could make a final vote, Andreth entered the circle from the crowd. Boromir granted her the opportunity to address the assembly. With determination, she stepped forward, entering the circle of seasoned men.

   Her bearing regal and her words measured, commanding the attention of the assembled lords. Her voice, though tinged with a hint of vulnerability, rang out with conviction.

  "Esteemed lords of the Free Peoples, I stand before you as the scion of a noble house, one whose very foundations were laid by the honoured deeds of my ancestor, Beör. It was none other than the elven lord Finrod Felugund, who bestowed these lands upon my forebear - a gift borne of his unconditional love and unbreakable loyalty to our kin. Her gaze swept the assembly.

  "I had the privilege of encountering him, but once, yet the impression he left upon my heart is indelible. For never have I met a kinder, more generous soul whose love and divinity extended to all under his care. A hush fell over the hall as she paused, her words hanging in the air like a challenge. "I beseech you, noble lords, to consider this: If Beör, our revered ancestor, were to stand among us now, faced with these same trials and tribulations, would he flee like a cowardly cur caught in a hailstorm? Or would he, with resolve, sacrifice his very lifeblood to defend what is rightfully his - our lands and our legacy?"

   Her voice rang out with a fervent, almost pleading tone, as she awaited the response of the assembled lords. Her impassioned words resonated within the hearts of those present. The silence that followed was pregnant with contemplation and introspection, as each lord weighed the significance of Andreth's plea.

   Aegnor watched her from behind his pillar. He hung upon her every word. Her radiance exuded within the hall. It was as though she was a becon of light that illuminated the entire room. In that hallowed moment, the decision that had seemed unanimous moments ago became mired in uncertainty. The lords exchanged glances, their expressions reflecting a mixture of determination, doubt, and a burgeoning sense of duty and so, within the flickering firelight of the great hall, the fate of Ladros hung in the balance; to abandon their ancestral home or to stand united, drawing strength from the elves.

    "We stay!" The fervent cry echoed through the air, each word filled with determination and hope. The crowd, moved by her impassioned speech, raised their voices in unison, their collective strength overpowering any doubts that lingered. One man rose abruptly from his chair, his voice lashing out like a whip, accusing Andreth of overstepping her place in the realm of men.

    Bregor, ever loyal, leapt to her defence without hesitation. With unwavering resolve, he confronted the old man, his voice firm and commanding, silencing the disrespectful accusations. The clash of wills hung heavy in the air, but the unwavering determination of the crowd began to wear down the resistance of the lords.

   The news of Ladros' decision to stay resonated through the hall. Grateful gazes washed over Andreth, their eyes filled with admiration and appreciation for the woman who had become their beacon of hope. Older women clustered around her, their voices praising her courage to speak out, but Andreth's fleeting glance fell upon Aegnor. Whose hidden features and fluid movements, she discerned so easily. He slipped away into the night.

    Drawn to him, Andreth found herself making her way outside into the wild throws of rain and thunder, heading toward the stables, where she discerned his shadow, moving along the floor within. She entered the stables, aglow with the soft kiss of moonlight. There she beheld him, his back to her, his hood lowered. He was hastily preparing his horse to leave, damp hair from the rain clung to his face. She observed him silently, each movement marked by a stormy fury akin to the torrential downpour outside.

    The warm glow of the stables beckoned, offering solace from the cold touch of the rain-soaked autumn night. Andreth, her wet cloak clinging to her, slowly approached from the entrance, her heart pounding in her chest. The air crackled when at that moment, the weight of their unspoken words hung heavy, a silent tempest that threatened to consume them both.

    "Aegnor?" she began softly as she approached him, drenched by the relentless rain. Aegnor paused, his gaze fixing intensely upon her, her skin and hair glistening with moisture. 

   "Return to your house, you did not see me," he murmured, returning to his task only far more slowly than before.

  "Aegnor... what is the matter?" She asked gently, stepping closer. A deep, audible, troubled sigh ghosted from his lips.

   "Have you seen war, Andreth?" he inquired, turning to her. Her breath danced in misty tendrils in the frigid air, her drenched form standing resolute against the tempestuous elements. "Nowhere remains to conceal your fear. They sever your feet from your body so you can not run. They sever your hands so you can not fight," Aegnor's voice grew charged with anger, his words resonating with a haunting intensity. "And when you can no longer escape, they tear you asunder! Ripping away the very flesh from your bones while—"

  "Stop it, Aegnor!" she shrieked.

  "How can you seek to fight that of which you know nothing!" he roared. His tempered fist struck the wood beside him, resounding in a thunderous thud, the force of which shook the entire structure within. She stood, stunned into a silence, her eyes swelling with tears.

     "What an utter fool you are Andreth!" He yelled, his voice breaking with pain, "You have doomed yourself and others! Did you not think of them!?" Tears pooled in her large, round eyes. She swallowed tensely and held his gaze with courage.

     "This is our home. We have no other place to run." she replied tenderly, her voice steady with remarkable clarity. "If we fall, we fall facing the rising sun, not the shadow it casts upon the ground, we are the Edain," she muttered, pausing, her voice breaking with unspoken longing. Aegnor stared into her as she stood before him, his expression softening upon her pitiful, drenched form.

  "And the children? What say do they have in their own fates while it is decided by those who  protect them?"

  "We all see the darkness, Aegnor. young, old, it makes no difference. He will come. One realm at a time. Their fate shall be ours."

  "I will not let you do this!" He whispered, shaking his head.

  "It is not your place to decide that! I chose this path, and I will not be quelled otherwise! Not even by you!"

    "Is that what you think of me?" He slowly advanced toward her, closing the distance between them. She tensed as he drew near, his footsteps creaking the wooden boards lightly with each measured step. "Is this truly how you perceive the depth of my care for you?" He murmured

   "No," she whispered fraily, her shimmering eyes finally breaking free from his penetrating gaze, casting them to the ground in retreat. "I did not mean to wound you, Aegnor,"

   His tension melted away, released in a long, soft sigh. The steam from his breath mingled with her damp hair. His lips tensed and leaned in close to her. She trembled as his lips stopped close to her ear, he whispered. "The agony of losing you to this war is one that I will not  be able to bear," his warm breath grazed her cheek and ear as he continued his heartfelt confession. "Andreth... I will perish without you."

    Her breath hitched with her as their eyes met once more. The very veins in her body burned with longing. With his face but a breath from hers, her eyes fell upon his mouth, and his lips drew every fibre within her. Every nerve in her body coiled. She swallowed hard, her voice reduced to a whisper that escaped her trembling lips. Then her eyes found his once more.

   "Aegnor..." she trembled, "You can not shield me from all things, just as you can not be shielded. Just as the day yields to the night, this truth you must accept. Nor by trial or desire, no matter how deep they run within us. We are powerless to alter this path."

    She turned away from him to leave. Swift hands seized her slender waist. With his body, he gently guided her back toward the wall. She stood pressed against the wall, and Aegnor, the gentle pressure of his strong body pressing softly into hers. She held his intense gaze, trembling with tension.

     "You speak with such conviction, yet there are truths you conceal within your heart." He murmured, his soft breath brushing into her face. Her eyes, shimmering in a bed of fragile tears, stared up into his. "If you truly believe your words, then go now, and you will look upon me nevermore,"

   Glistening round pools, teary and guileless, stared up at him, searching in the depths of his. Her quivering lip drooped as a tear spilt from her eye. Her chest heaving with deepening sorrow at his words. Seeing how much it affected her, Aegnor placed his hand on the wall beside her head. Deep, laboured breaths whispered from him as he grappled with his profound anguish.

   Soft rumbles of distant thunder and the lashing echoes of the torrential downpour whispered around them, bathed in the soft glow of the nights lonely moonlight.

   "Andreth,"  he murmured, "Can you truly not see the depths of my anguish?" he whispered, his fragility emanated in his raw voice.

   The soft brush of fingertips slid down her plump, pale cheek. Then, with a sudden, unexpected switch, the pad of his thumb crept along the plump curves of her soft lips and pressed down. A shudder rippled through Andreth's body, matching the low growls of the thunder that whispered outside. Her lips parted on a breathy sigh, every nerve ending alight with the electric thrill of his caress. Her eyes fluttered closed, fanning against her flushed cheeks. Her head fell back against the wall, exposing the arch of her delicate neck as a wave of blissful surrender washed over her. Aegnor breathed softly, his drunk eyes soaking all of it in. His voice, strained and hushed, he uttered the words.

"Can love exist between us..." he began, his thumb smoothing reverently across her trembling lips, "...without surrendering the deepest parts of us?"

    The weight of his question hung heavy in the air. Her eyes flickered open, and  her breath caught in her throat. The sting of tears welling up spilt from her eyes, and, with a long, resolute sigh, her gaze turned deeply sad. With a calm strength, she pushed out from under him and walked away. Her form sinking away into the night.

     Aegnor was left alone, his glassy eyes mirroring the look of one, abandoned in the sea of a thousand longings. Lost in the labyrinth of his own ruminations. A sombre veil of uncertainty descended upon his sunken heart. He gazed into the empty void where her presence once had occupied. The thunder roared, a manifestation of the raging storm that consumed him from within. A hope abandoned, he sank deeper into loneliness that numbed the pain in his heart. At least there, he could find a measure of solace, however small.

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