Tyelkormo's Great Escape by Aprilertuile

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The problem


Tyelkormo was currently outside the house, hiding from his mother.

It was nearly winter and every winter was peak matchmaking activity time in Tirion’s palace. So Nerdanel focused more on her sons at this period since she wanted them to make a good impression so they could find a good wife as was proper for young adult elves.

She was all the more enthusiastic this year since she still believed that her plotting had worked for Makalaurë the previous year.

It really hadn’t, but she didn’t know that: His brother was a good actor and none of the siblings wanted to tell the truth to their mother on that point.

Alas now she seemed to have given up on Maitimo finding anyone anytime soon, and Makalaurë was seemingly in love and so she was focusing all her attention on him this year and…

Alas, Tyelkormo didn’t want that.

He didn’t want to give any false hope to his mother or to any of the noble girls of the palace.

He didn’t want a significant other.

He didn’t even want sex!

The mere idea of someone, anyone, touching him like that made his skin crawl and made him want to move permanently in the dark Avathar where no one ever went for safety’s sake.

And to top that off, he didn’t even want a child, so why would he bother trying to find a partner? The utter displeasure of living with an invasive other being who’d have opinions on him or his dog, or his manners or his chosen craft?

He’d end up living permanently in the wilds, never to return to civilization again!

He had tried already to tell his mother that, but according to her, he’d “grow out of this soon enough and would be grateful for her help in finding a good partner.”

But it was already true when he was a teenager, and still now as an adult it was true and he didn’t feel like it’d change anytime soon. He just didn’t want that!

But she didn’t want to hear him and her recent plans to have him participate in the string of the palace’s winter events for the express purpose of meeting hopeful young ladies was making his skin crawl. He was going to have to bite someone or otherwise create a scandal at court just to avoid people this season, he could feel it.

His father was going to be so disappointed in him…

He jumped, startled, when Maitimo sat on the branch next to him:

“I’ll have you know, brother mine, that I hate having to climb trees, so I’d greatly appreciate it if you could find a less bothersome hiding place.”

Tyelkormo snorted at that: “Alternatively you could have taken my chosen hiding space as a sign I wanted to see no one.”

“No, because mom is looking for you and I get the feeling that you hiding here is not an unrelated thing. So, do you want to share your troubles with me or do I need to involve Makalaurë?” Maitimo asked him.

“Mom is just being her usual self and trying to convince me that to marry is the goal of my life. Only… I don’t want a wife. I don’t want sex! I don’t want children! Just the idea of touching another like that, or being touched or. Or having an invasive other in my life or…”

Maitimo shivered next to him and nodded. Tyelkormo had probably let something linked through Osanwë. Oh well…

“I can feel it yes. You really don’t like the idea, uh? Ok then. Come with me, we’ll need Makalaurë’s help for that.”

“Why?”

“Because for mom’s planning, failure is the only option in the light of your feelings on the matter, and for that, we’ll need a distraction and Makalaurë’s our best bet.”

Tyelkormo sighed but followed his elder brother out of the tree. They gathered in their father’s workshop where their mother never went. Their father was at the palace of Tirion for the day at the request of his father so the place was sure to be empty.

“Alright, what may I do for you, my darling brothers, when I could and really should be working on…” Makalaurë started.

“Mom’s ambition to push us to find a wife is well focused on Tyelko this year, as you well know.”

“And so?”

“And we need your help to distract mom.”

Makalaurë was clearly going to protest, but Maitimo looked at him sharply and something passed between them through Osanwë. Tyelkormo thought briefly how he hated when his brothers did that and kept him out of the loop but right now perhaps he preferred not to know exactly what Maitimo showed or told their brother. 

Whatever it was, Makalaurë turned absolutely serious.

“Alright then. Never mind me. What are we going to do? Because I can try to distract mom but when she gets an idea, she’s hard to distract, and won’t let me get in the way for long.”

“Tyelko is going to prepare a bag and he will spend the winter up north, doing the mapping of the settlements that dad wanted. And if he happens to incidentally get caught in a snow related situation, it couldn’t possibly be on purpose.”

“Uh… Better him than me! Have you seen the north in this season?!” Makalaurë said with an exaggerated shiver.

“I’ll take hiking in the north over having to tolerate meeting the people mom wants me to meet right now.” Tyelkormo grumbled.

“Good because it’s exactly what you’ll do.” Maitimo told him.

“Alright? So?”

“So we need to distract mom long enough that Tyelko can make his bag, grab provisions, his horse and leave. And that, my dearest, most dramatic and loud brother, is exactly what we need your help for.”

Makalaurë’s grin at that was sharp.

“Oh how I adore you, brother mine. I suppose it’s time, indeed. My epic love story with myself must come to an end. How tragic… There will be Songs about it! What did I say? Songs. Laments! Entire ballads!”

“Right. I’ll really be better off up north.” Tyelkormo grumbled.

“Makalaurë, we need you to be as loud and obnoxious as you can be, and to stay as close to mom as you can! As soon as you distract mom we’ll either take the side door or I’ll go in and open my room’s window for Tyelko!”

“I really hope it’ll work.” Tyelkormo mumbled.

“I really hope so too.” Maitimo answered with a faint smile.

“Well, I will go now. Pray for my poor broken heart! And if you so happen to meet with a woodworker willing to take a commission for a complicated musical instrument on your way, please Tyelko, remember fondly my sacrifice this day.”

Tyelkormo blinked even as Makalaurë left them to go back to the house, crying for their mother.

“I absolutely hate the fact that he enjoys that kind of…”

Maitimo chuckled at that.

“Makalaurë is bored out of his mind, brother. That is all the reason he needs to make some noise in any way he can.”

By now Makalaurë had found their mother and had thrown himself in her arms, crying helplessly and loudly. But the sound alas told Maitimo that they were in the kitchen of the house.

“And here goes my plan. Go wait under my window, I’ll go open it for you.”

They separated, Maitimo going inside by the living-room side door, alas in plain view of the kitchen where Makalaurë had found their mother, and went to his bedroom on the first floor. He opened the window and let Tyelkormo in:

“You’re far too quick to climb anything, you know that right?”

“It’s fun most of the time.”

“Pack for heavy weather. Warm clothing. Don’t be an idiot and good luck. I’ll keep watch just in case.”

Tyelkormo made his pack as he’d make it for hunting in the North with the Hunt of Oromë. He’d be fine with it. He then was told by his brother to go straight to the stables.

“No food supplies then?”

“Stop in Tirion for those, mom isn’t moving from the kitchen. Go. Be careful. Try to avoid dad in Tirion.”

“Got it.”

Makalaurë was downright wailing by now and even from the stables, Tyelkormo’s ears were ringing with all of his brother’s noise.

“I’d hate to be mom right now.”

“Mom is starting to want more kids, so that’ll be a nice reminder that kids are noisy little things.” Maitimo snorted.

“Is that why she’s that unbearable this time around?”

“I’d think so. Now go before she realizes that something’s up.”

“You think she can even hear her own thoughts long enough through Makalaurë’s racket to realize that anything is going on?!”

“It’s mom! What do you think?

Tyelkormo grimaced, accepting that point, and just grabbed a blanket for his horse, and added another one for when they’d be up north and left the stable, leading the horse carefully so they’d stay out of sight of the kitchen.

He then mounted up and left in somewhat of a hurry. He needed to leave fast and most of all he needed to be at least a day of travel away before he’d be safe from his mother shall she discover his disappearance. 


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