What REALLY Happened; A Falling-out Among Thieves; or Get It In Writing by Cee Cee
Fanwork Notes
Author’s note: I think it’s high time I posted something, so I yanked this little section from a much longer work still under construction and sent it out to stand alone. Poor thing.
Author’s revision: A bit soon, but not soon enough. The original material for this story was not written to stand alone. Some parts appeared elsewhere in the longer work-in-progress. Now that I’ve had time to think (post now, think later) I find that it’s better all in one place. So here it is.
Arachnophobes, beware!
- Fanwork Information
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Summary:
Summary
That old villain Melkor, Ungoliant in tow, had plagued Valinor, vandalizing trees, swiping jewels—oh, yes, and killing poor Finwe—then done a bunk.
In this bit, we join them in Middle-earth to observe the end of a not-so-beautiful friendship…ah…partnership.
Major Characters: Melkor, Ungoliant
Major Relationships:
Genre: Humor
Challenges:
Rating: General
Warnings:
Chapters: 1 Word Count: 473 Posted on 10 May 2018 Updated on 4 July 2018 This fanwork is complete.
Chapter 1
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In which a Vala and a spider dispute the terms of their agreement.
They had made excellent progress after their escape from Valinor and already had arrived in Middle-earth. But Melkor and Ungoliant, also known as Beauty and the Beast, were not in the best of moods.
The spider’s assimilation of the light of jewels from their haul had not satisfied her in the least, and Melkor’s supply of spider treats and his patience had run out.
“You promisssssssed,” she hissed. Really, Melkor thought, she had the most unpleasant—still, here they were, he reminded himself. You go with the allies you have, not the ones you wish you had.
“You ssssssaid you would give with both handsssssss.”
“Could you ease up on the sibilance?” Melkor grumbled.
“What isssss that in your other hand?” she persisted.
“All I have left,” the Vala snapped crossly. “You’ve eaten everything else. You know, if your behind grows any bigger, wearing black won’t help you.”
Perhaps that was the wrong thing to say, he thought, as the much-enlarged monster swiveled all her eyes around to give him an evil stare; nevertheless, the constant hissing was shredding his nerves.
“Give me sssssome light,” she demanded.
“Look,” he countered, becoming desperate, “You’ve eaten all I have.”
“Not thossssssse ssssssilmarilsssssss!”
“Right you are,” he was shouting now, “Not those silmarils!” As a rule, he liked monsters, but this one...
“Go suck on Varda’s stars!” He cried.
As Ungoliant prepared herself to spring, the greatest of the Valar, taking evasive action, gave a loud cry of command, and instantly his multitude of followers streamed to his side at incredible speed.
When the dark forces converged upon her, Ungoliant, now terrified in her turn, fled south to hide in her refuge of cold and deepest darkness. Thus was Melkor rescued by his minions.
That was, to hear him tell it! In truth, when Melkor’s followers arrived, they found him tangled in the strands of Ungoliant’s web like a codfish in a net, mad as a hornet* and yelling bloody murder.
No one dared to laugh. Balrogs cut him free with their whips of fire.
It is said that the echoes of Melkor’s cries still can be heard in a certain remote part of Middle-earth.
Yes, really.
At first, Ungoliant fled into the Mountains of Terror, where she found and enjoyed a succession of mates. They were delicious.
Most notable of her issue was her daughter Shelob. They did not get along.
The tales relate that Ungoliant dwells, perhaps to this day, in farthest depths of the frozen South. That would be Antarctica, no doubt.
Scientists have been living and working there within the last century or so.
And the ice is melting.
*Yankeeism for very, very angry.
THE END
Chapter End Notes
Afterword
In which the author attempts to explain what she is doing.
For my maiden entry into writing fan-fic, my plan is to write a series of stand-alones based on the Silmarillion, grouped under the master-title What REALLY Happened, with each story having its own sub-title and separate topic.
However, when I posted my first, about Elrond’s engagement, I wrongly marked it as incomplete, because the series, WRH, is ongoing. Now that I’ve got some help on the computer, I have corrected this.
I hire help to post, too, looking on it as a sort of vanity-publishing expense. My hobby!
Whew! This has been harder to write than the story.
Cee Cee
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