I Stood Aside by Flora-lass

Burning.

Ships blazing, swans dying.

I watch the flames with smarting eyes

I hear the screams, and my ears roar

I smell the smoke, as it fills my hair

I taste the ash which chokes me

And I touch your gold, wound tightly round my hand,

But you are out of reach.

What use to close my eyes or block my ears 

Or turn away and run?

This burning will forever be with me, as it is now

In my heart, in my hair, on my head.

For I stood aside and did not stop it

And left you stranded.

Spirit of Fire, my father, you have deepened our Doom!

You will end in flames, and so will I.

In madness for what you made, you destroy the craft of others

And I cannot help but hate you.

You abandon our followers, our friends

And Findekano.

Fare well, my valiant one!

Stay safe on that distant shore, and forget me.

There can be no forgiveness.

Yet I fear you will attempt the Ice!

Which is worse? For you to be so far away

Or for you to come?

How can we live in this new land

When our only light is fire?

What hope is there in the horror?

But my brothers call for me.

They will need my comfort

Though I find none.

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(For the prompts: pale, sick, hope, ship)

Maedhros heard his name, and turned to see three figures stumbling towards him, illuminated by the fires and all appearing equally distressed. What comfort could he possibly offer, when he felt no hope himself? But he had been the eldest for a long time, and his feet automatically carried him forward to meet them.
Before he could even try to hug them all at once, however, as he had done so many times before, Amrod slid to the ground with a whimper, Maglor going down with him and breaking his fall. Maglor turned pale and looked about to be sick, as he had been on the journey across the sea.
And Amras…Amras clung to Maedhros for dear life and sobbed his heart out about how his twin must be in shock because his family had tried to burn him alive, but how could he ever have wanted to take a ship and sail away on his own like that, but Maglor had helped rescue him so Maedhros shouldn't be angry with any of them, please, and their father had gone mad and why was any of this happening? And he just wanted to go home. And he was so, so sorry about their cousins…
‘Hush now,’ Maedhros said at last. ‘You're in shock too. Let's sit down, at least.’
The four of them huddled together, Maglor also crying now, with Amrod limp in his arms. ‘We burned the swan ships!' Maglor lamented over and over again. ‘How could we do that? How?’ Maedhros had no answer, except to reproach himself, silently and endlessly, for standing aside when he should have tried to stop it. 
And then Fëanor came striding over, with the others in tow.
‘What's going on here?’ he demanded. ‘Get up, all of you, there's work to do!’

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