Jubilant Potluck by Grundy

Cultural Misunderstandings

Prompts: Potluck Material World sod, flax, leather

Zingers ("May your genitals sprout wings and fly away", "If you gave him an enema, they could bury him in a matchbox.")

“I do not understand ‘sod it’, either. Sod is a useful building material.”

Elros gave in, howling with laughter. The explanation of both what an enema was as well as why you would be able to bury someone in a matchbox after one had already had him on the edge. Elrond’s mouth twitched, but if he broke down, they’d never get through this.

Celebrimbor’s first encounter with Men other than Turin or Tuor had not gone well. His impulse to ask the twins to explain some of the things said to him in (not entirely unjustified) exasperation wasn’t wrong, exactly, but it was as well none of their elders had heard that Elros knew quite a few of the expressions – or Celebrimbor’s puzzlement at them.

He’d started with, “how could my genitals fly away even if they did sprout wings? They’d still be trapped in my trousers. They’d not break the linen, much less the leather.” It had gotten more (or less, depending on your perspective) amusing from there.

You’re no help whatsoever, Elrond grumbled.

Am so – I’m the one who will take the blame for us knowing all these reprehensible concepts when we tell Aunt Eärwen about it later.