We Will Be Who We Are by Lotrfan

Oh goodness, this is so well thought out and absolutely heart-breaking.  The part where Elros says they are being left behind again and should be used to it was where my heart turned over for the first time.  And then the decision to take the jewels, and evil end coming to them.  Oh dear. 

This is very good. 

Beautiful--you made me cry first thing when I woke up in the morning:

Who would remember the kind, tender older brother Nelyo had been? The joking prankster that was Tyelko? The precise figures that Moryo could conjure out of nowhere, his writing neat and precise, the faint blush of pride on his face at a job well done. Who would remember Curvo, revising and reworking a metal hand, so that his eldest brother could feel whole again? And who would recall the twin faces of his younger brothers, breathless with laughter, as they once again confused their uncle as to their identities?

Well, done. I love the description of Maedhros' treasures. Love the relationship with Elrond and Elros also and the picture you draw of those two!

I really like the dignity, the polish if you will, of these four characters in your version: that they are facing the complex dilemmas of the end game in the War against Morgoth, still trying to make the best of their choices, and hoping for things to turn out a little better than the worst case.

For Elros and Elrond, this works --and if we think about the future, the Second and Third Age, it's world-changing. So that last good thing that Maedhros and Maglor did: raising the boys, and giving them up sometime before their last hopeless attempt on the jewels--has perhaps the greatest impact on the future, of anything they ever did. 

But I like the way you play their parting, with a sort of understated affection. Fingon's letters are a beautiful touch, and makes me think of the distant future in which Elrond's Rivendell is a place of learning and lore, where the past is remembered and Men, Dwarves or Hobbits encounter touches of the Elder Days. Even if only Elrond and a few of his old companions remembers the personal realities.

"They would live on as dreadful caricatures of themselves . . " Every part of the last scene is wonderful.

I loved the way in which you portrayed the relationship between the twins and the last of the Fëanorians, and also Ereinion's attitude towards the four of them. It was convincing and beautifully done. Having Elrond and Elros witness Eönwë's response to the request for the Silmarils was a clever touch that I've never considered before, although it makes such perfect sense. And those final musings about who would remember the Fëanorians as they also were, rather than as Kinslayers only, along with Maedhros' precious keepsakes and his step off the cliff... heartbreaking. Very well done.

Took me forever, but I'm finally posting my initial reactions to this! I wrote them down while writing, so they're not incredibly intellectual. A lot of minor details in here made me think and want to explore new aspects of canon. 

Play by play reaction:

• Oh my god, Erestor!? That’s so genius!
• Loving the fact M&M have different views on the half-elven
• *nods head in agreement* skirmishes are waaaay different than battle
• Letters? They’re in contact with Gilly? I wanna know more. 
• Ey! I’ve had the same exact thought about Elwing (and Eärendil)
• (Now I wanna go explore the idea of the Quenya ban, because we see it again by the Third Age, but I can also see how in the First Age everyone would be tentative about speaking it, even with Thingol dead)
• I like the handling of Gilly and the Fëanorians handling E&E’s fostering/captivity
• Re: relatedness *except for Celeborn*
• Oh! I like One being capitalized. Tolkien would approve.
• How did I forget E&E would probably be viewed as Gilly’s heir? (Also, when did I start calling Gil-galad “Gilly”?)
• I love your passive-aggressive, but not overly-so Círdan. 
• The physical maturity not equating emotional maturity is my favorite thing ever.
• :) YAY FOR RECOGNIZING MELIAN
• They kinda do have a better claim, don’t then? Unless the Noldor followed Salic succession (boo) or had full-blooded elves come before half-elven
• Excellent strategic thinking, Elrond. Heirs shouldn’t be right next to their liege (unless they’re, like, super safe in the back)
• I CHANGED MY MIND ERESTOR IS THE BEST THING EVER. MOTHER HEN ERESTOR. HEADCANON ACCEPTED.
• Ouch, goodbyes hurt.
• Heh, clever little Elrond
• *will never cease to be confused by Tolkien’s conception of free-will in Arda*
• *also, Tolkien, you really should’ve expanded on what happened to the Fëanorians when they died*
• I’m sad. This is sad. 
• Thank you for not making Eonwë a jerk.
• Huh. I never thought about how Doriath and Sirion survivors would feel about the jewels going West. 
• Good for Erestor. Talk sense into the idiots. (It’s painful because you know it won’t work)
• My heart broke at “To mother.”
• Why do they always think people won’t put up a fight? It’s totally in-character, though.
• YOU PROMISED YOU’D COME BACK FOR THEM YOU IDIOTS. YOU OWE THEM CLOSURE.

I meant to re-read this over the holidays and comment in more detail. I didn't manage it, and so I just want to say that it struck me as so well done, at the time of Silm40! (And the only reason I didn't comment then was because I was very tired.)

I read this when it was posted but I think it was on my phone and never got back to comment. Have actually stopped reading fic on my phone because this has become such a bad habit. Anyhow, I reread it tonight and saw I hadn't told you how very much I liked it. It's sometimes a bit odd seeing parts of a story you've told yourself from someone else's pov. Often it doesn't quite work, but this was wonderful. I loved your view of the twins and their relationship with Maglor and Maedhros, liked Ereinion (that's usually my deal breaker, lol), and agreed that the twins would likely have been sent to Balar rather than take their chances in battle - keep the only surviving heirs safe. Oh, and Erestor. I was so glad to see him there.

I don't usually write the Feanorions, so I've not played with the end of their story, but there are things I've often wondered - what were they planning to do once they got hold of the Silmarils, and why did Maglor not follow his brother this final time - and your answers resonate for me.

Maedhros' tear streaked face lifted up to meet his. "We give them back, of course. We need to claim them to bring this damned Oath to an end. I do not want them—they are nothing to me but a means to an end. Father may have cherished them but to me they are but a symbol of the loss and anguish we have suffered for so long." He gave his brother a weak smile. "Once we have them, we will give them to Yavanna. To bring the Trees back to life and to let us go home again. To Tirion. To mother. To peace."

Yes, that makes perfect sense, just didn't go as planned - again. And this -- this was beautiful and I had tears in my eyes reading it:

Maedhros tightened his fingers around the jewel that scorched his hand. His stump reached up to rub at the front of his tunic, where the deep, hidden pocket held his most precious treasures: the last of Fingon's letters and the bloodied, scorched scrap of Fingon's silver and blue standard, salvaged from the battlefield of the Nirnaeth Arnoediad. The golden ribbon at his wrist shimmered in the light. He closed his eyes and stepped over the edge into the fire below, Maglor's guttural, wordless cry the last thing Maedhros heard before his end.

And at the end, Maglor as I know him:

No one. They would live on as dreadful caricatures of themselves, the essence of who they were forgotten by all, their names cursed for eternity. He would live, damn it. He would live to remember. He would live to honor their memory. Maglor turned his back on the encampment, turned his back on all that had gone before. He had his memories. He didn't need anything else.

Thank you for sharing this, I'm sorry the review is so late.

This is a wonderful story. I love the characterizations.