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If the hard choices did not have consequences they wouldn't matter, I feel - and my Nerdanel also came to that conclusion after it was too late to change her mind, so I see them as very similar... despite approaching the future from opposite directions, their paths align at this point and towards the War of Wrath.

This is very beautiful. I especially like the section where she describes the memories. 

Memories she clung to, half-mist and dream-like as they were, but still, she had no wish to forget what she had once known, like so many others.

I can totally relate to that. I want to remember the good and the bad of my life--the triumphs and the mistakes. All of those things build experience and make us who we are. (I've never been wild about the version of canon where people are born anew and have no memories. This story is kind of a compromise between the two extremes.)