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I've added this story to my favorites and--to anyone who might stumble upon this review--give "The Apprentice" my heartiest recommendation.

There are characters in Tolkien's works whom I am determined never to like, and Sauron is one of them. Or, I should say, was. Because this story brought him alive in a way I'd never quite imagined before. He is funny and intimidating (I felt a moment's misgiving, providing beta comments, when critiquing a line of his dialogue), and as the story progresses and his character becomes increasingly darker, the reader knows his inevitable end ... and his lack of power to stop it.

And Samaril ... I want to bring Samaril home with me and cuddle all his troubles away. Which is quite a feat since for most of the novella, Samaril is a swaggering, pompous ass. But such is the brilliance of the characters in this tale that even the larger-than-life geniuses among the Noldor are made human again. As Aulendil would say, just like we mortals.

Funny, heartbreaking, breathtaking, and a story I wished never to end (and have read three times now and would gladly read again), "The Apprentice" is a joy to read and guaranteed to make readers never look at Tolkien's world quite the same way again.

Thanks so much for the accolades, Dawn!  I greatly appreciate the favorable review as well as the availability of the nicely crafted and much-more-than-adequate SWG as a repository for my ficcish and non-ficcish natterings. Given that you found Sauron to be funny and intimidating, then I have done my job.  It’s difficult for me to imagine that so many Men and Elves would have “fallen” for him if he had not been smart, charismatic and persuasive or if said Firstborn and Followers were not clamoring for “the knowledge he genuinely had” as JRRT put it.  As for Samaril, I love him, too, and he might  just be a composite of the arrogant, cocky guys I have worked with in the labs over the years – guys for all their swaggering still harbored inherent warmth, affection and vulnerability. 

I have a burgeoning set of WIPs of that Second Age milieu (my dark muse just will not take “No!” as an answer)  including what looks like another novella set shortly after the War of Wrath; it’s written from the first person POV from the man himself.  Heh.

 Thanks again!

I've been meaning to come around here for a while now, and glad I didn't - and I'm just at the author's notes! :O!

However, your introductory note was most successful in piquing my curiosity, and I am both excited and intrigued to see that this story will muchly incorporate your extensive knowledge and experience of the scientific/academic field. I don't think I've seen Sauron done this way at all, but thinking about it now, the idea of it makes so much *sense*.

Enough rambling - I'm going to proceed with the story proper!

Way back when I first read The Lord of the Rings as a teenager, Sauron came across a fairly unidimensional being: the largely unseen villain orchestrating his dark forces around the War of the Ring.  However, I think Gandalf made a comment to the effect that even Sauron wasn't always evil.  I thought that was intriguing when I first read it. Then, as a Silm geek, I saw this elaborated on a bit more ("On The Rings of Power and The Third Age").  The History of Middle-earth and Tolkien's Letters further revealed more complexity to Sauron's character and strongly suggested he was a master technologist. I think that's how Tolkien saw him: Sauron represented the worst of technology and industrialization.  His acumen as a scientist/technologist (in addition to that of an adroit politician) would be seen as magic or necromancy (a la Arthur C. Clarke's third law).  Couple that with JRRT's comment that Sauron was not yet "wholly evil" during the early to mid-Second Age and there are the makings for a more complex character, perhaps even scarier because of the lingering elements of "good" intentions in him.  The story is largely his apprentice's (read: grad student's :^D) viewpoint but hopefully will reveal something about the mentor, too.

 Thanks so much for giving this a shot, Klose!  I realize that an emotionally complex and genuinely knowledgeable Sauron* is not very palatable to many.  And I hope you like his ambitious student, Sámaril, the primary protagonist.  I liked him enough to give him another story. :^)

*Not that I think he's a good guy even if he's a brilliant one.  On the contrary, Sauron of the pandemoniverse gives me the chills since I know what a back-stabber he is! 

 

 

Oh my. What a captivating look into (Sauron)'s head as he wraps his mind around this new form. Yes, very science-y - I admit my eyes glazed over once or twice (I am determined to figure out "Then, he had assembled the protein complex to bind the regulatory element of the master gene that orchestrated the interplay of biochemical systems peculiar to the Elves", however. Molecular genetics always goes straight over my head), but that's a mark of my poor attention span, rather than anything else. ;)

The interplay of insightful psychology and science is most potently executed. There is a beautiful poetry to the way he sees the world; galaxies spiraling in the far reaches of universe [...] the tectonic clashes of the plates of the earth".

I feel like this deserves far more thoughtful analysis than I can provide, but suffice to say that I am most intrigued and impressed at this point. :) This is a most innovative and refreshing approach to Silmfic. (I like that picture that 'heads' the chapter, and the quote!)

"Yes, very science-y"

Chapter 1 is definitely the most science-y of all and the most uncompromising in that sense. :^)

"I am determined to figure out 'Then, he had assembled the protein complex to bind the regulatory element of the master gene that orchestrated the interplay of biochemical systems peculiar to the Elves.'"

Ai, carambë!  Yeah, this is pretty technical, but I couldn't resist leaving it in place.  This is a nod to a lot of the current thinking on how regulation of gene expression (proteins binding to regulatory sequences of DNA) affects physical characteristics (phenotype). This probably isn't the place to nerd out and offer my crazed arm-waving speculation on elvish physiology but suffice it to say that it is known in our primary world that fairly small genetic events at the regulatory level - which avoids mutations - can result in big phenotypic effects.  I figure (based on JRRT's writings) that the Firstborn and Men must be very similar genetically but that their profound differences arise from something subtle.  Gene regulation might account for that.  Not that you have any free time as a bona fide student, but if you have a chance, check out Sean B. Carroll's books: Endless Forms Most Beautiful and The Making of The Fittest. 

I know plenty of folks say that science can't be applied to Middle-earth.  Au contraire!  Even Tolkien himself gives permission for us to enter his secondary world and study its biology (see letter 153 to Peter Hastings).  That said, often the wave of a wizard's wand (alluding to The Notion Club Papers) is the best tactic. There's a lot of stuff that Sauron is able to accomplish that is a mystery to me even if there might be a scientific basis (a la Clarke's Third Law) for it.  ;^)

Thanks so much for taking a look at this and for the wonderful comments!

(I'm still here, and slowly making my way through this story - apologies for the my reviews arriving in drips and drabs like this!)

If there is anything that would closely resemble modern ways of doing thhings, I think it would be the way the Brotherhood works. But there's still a danger of making it too modern as to be obscure and not credible in the context of Elves and Middle-earth. 

This is the way it should be done, though - the sense of the way of life and culture in Eregion comes through very accessibly in this chapter. I do like Sámaril! :D (And his family, too.) He's honest about his arrogance  and ambition, which I like - and there's also a sense of naivete about him in the way he sees everything, and youthful self-absorption into his work/studies (as you might expect).  

I've learned a new term: "eutectic point".


"Describe the three sub-species of athelas, their current distribution in Eriador, and their rank order of therapeutic potency."

LOLed at "therapeutic potency" bit - but also thought, "oh, crap" on behalf of Sámaril. (Reminds me a bit of my own interview with a certain pharma giant, wherein I blanked out and struggled to answer questions, too - it's kind of reassuring to see Sámaril go through the same, even if he is a fictional character. :P) But I love the peek of how Biology as we know it might be 'applied' to Middle-earth

Couldn't help but giggle Sámari's excitement and dancing at the end - I think we can all relate to that. :D I still felt a little chill at Aulendil in that last scene, though...

"But there's still a danger of making it too modern as to be obscure and not credible in the context of Elves and Middle-earth."

Definitely!  And I tread a fine line all too often with regard to this. Yet amazingly, Tolkien - in his letter (153) to Hastings - makes it pretty clear that the Eregion Noldor were really enamoured of technology.  Speaking of that particular term and its companion, "science,"  Dawn pointed out that there are actually terms in Quenya which accurately translate into such concepts: nolwë (philosophy, including science) and curwë (application of skill, invention).  I was really tickled to have that pointed out!

"it's kind of reassuring to see Sámaril go through the same, even if he is a fictional character..."

Heh.  I might have experienced the same kind of grilling from my own Annatars when I was in grad school.

Thanks again! 

Ai! Noooo... - it can't end like that! (Except of course it does.)

 The last chapter tied a lot of threads together in a very satisfying manner.

 I'm going to go away to cry into my handkerchief with some tiny hope of redemption (at the end of all things) for Aulendil - which is not completely against canon I trust ;)

From Appendix B, The Tale of Years, Lord of the Rings: "1200: Sauron endeavors to seduce the Eldar." Ah ha!  So he ensnared you, too! :^D

In Letter 153 in The Letters of J.R.R. Tolkien (ed. H. Carpenter), Tolkien wrote that Sauron, upon being given the opportunity of repentance after the War of Wrath, couldn't face the humiliation that recantation would entail..."so his temporary turn to good and 'benevolence' ended in a greater relapse, until he became the main representative of Evil of later ages."  So according to JRRT, one might conclude that redemption is right out.  However, the pandemoniverse is fraught with moral relativism and lots of shades of grey (well, not unlike The Silmarillion) rather than binary Good and Evil.   If anything, Aulendil may have been so frightened of being stuck in that singularity with his old boss until the End of Eä that he may very well have repented eventually and as part of his penance wound up counseling a famous twentieth century physicist.  I expect the manipulative Valar have something in mind for his redemption in both direct and indirect ways.  Stay tuned! :^D

And thanks a million for the wonderful off-the-radar screen comments! 

 

There are many things I enjoyed in the story: the views of the vast unexplored (by most fanfics) expanses of the Second Age.  Sauron as a much more complicated, fascinating character than the LOTR proverbial evil guy which makes it easier to understand why Celebrimbor and the Noldor fall under his sway (again). The descriptions of society (the guilds, the contrasts between the Numenorean settlements and the Elvish centers and how they relate) I particularly enjoyed the comment about "Elvish sense of entitlement" .  Also Samaril's parents who lived through all the First Age horrors and survived but still bear the scars. The illustrations at the head of each chapter. In short, I'm off to read the next story about Samaril and any other you share

Muchos gracias, Angelica!  I greatly appreciate your comments, and I am glad that you enjoyed the story.  It's especially gratifying for me that you picked up on exactly what I was attempting to convey - culture and characters both - in this first-time novella.  Like you, I read The Silmarillion avidly years ago, and only discovered Silmarillion fan fiction a little over a year ago.  When wandering around Silmarillion fandom, I noted that there were many fine stories covering the First Age and our favorite icons (Fëanor and his sons, other Finwëans, famous Sindar) so I thought I'd try another Age and a different take on another icon.  I recognize that an emotionally complex Annatar/Sauron may not be palatable to many Tolkien fans who embrace the Good vs. Evil dichotomy.  In fact, when I was much younger, I wondered how such a dark evil entity like LOTR Sauron could have "seduced the Eldar."  Many years and experiences with those who have a bit of Sauron-the-Technologist (good, bad and all shades of grey in between) in them made that much more plausible.

The Second Age is surprisingly less explored* but quite rich for interpretative fan fiction.  I expect Aulendil will make a retrospective appearance at some point in the next story about Sámaril. :^)

Those fractal images are really nice, aren't they?  Sven Geier has made them readily available and shares them freely. 

Thanks again!

*Full of Wisdom and Perfect in Beauty by Gadira (on this site) is a beautifully crafted vision of Second Age Númenor. Highly recommended.

I hope this review won't sound stupid.

Not in the least!

I admit knowing nothing about science even as a layperson, but I simply let the story pull me on since I can understand the theories of things in science, just not how any-one could possibly reach that theory.

I'm probably treading a fine line - or a knife's edge :^) - by setting scientific concepts into a Tolkienian framework, but JRRT himself fills his world with science, thus making his secondary world more "real."  I have strived to keep these concepts accessible to the layman, and hopefully craft an entertaining story at the same time.  Tolkien was pretty explicit in stating that the Noldor were on the side of "science and technology" and that Sauron possessed a tremendous amount of knowledge in such (in The Lost Road, we find that Sauron has made metal-hulled ships that do not need the wind to move - steam engines?) so I ran with that. 

Re: reaching those theories of science - scientific hypothesis is all about imagination and "what if's" - a "hawk flight of the imagination" to quote Olaf Stapledon, a science fiction writer contemporaneous with Tolkien.

I also like Sauron portrayed this way. And you mentioned Paradise Lost in your notes; I took that as part of my coursework in school * mumblemnumble* years ago, and since reading it my perception of evil as being a [ frankly rather boring ] blank wall has undergone a change. 

That's good to hear since a prevailing view seems to be of The Flaming Eyeball of Absolute Evil :^D.  Which is fine - everyone has her or his own view, but JRRT's writings (outside of the LotR) seem to indicate a more complex character.  I found and read Pink Siamese's A Dawn of Many Colors and enjoyed that immensely.  Hers is yet another interpretation which illustrates why I like Tolkienian fan fiction so much.  It's akin to setting out a bowl of fruit and a vase in front of a group of artists from different schools of design.  One might paint a realistic still life, another will paint with an impressionistic style, and yet another will create an abstract piece.  I was also tickled to see that Pink Siamese had also been impressed and influenced by David Brin's article.

For all that Tolkien said about Evil not being creative, Sauron (at least in certain stages of his existence) seems to be so.  There's a little blurb in the latest Parma Eldalamberon in which Tolkien writes that Sauron created the Black Speech which "was meant to be self-consistent, very different from Elvish, yet organized and expressive, as would be expected of a device of Sauron before his complete corruption."  So Sauron and Tolkien had something in common - they made up their own languages!  I like to think that in addition to equations and such, Aulendil was also formulating his new language when Sámaril found him busily writing with that superlative script. :^D

 I would also imagine both of them as impatient with people who were not as intelligent, which is most people.

Ha!  Absolutely!  They remind me of a few Ivy League scientists I've met, but then I see both Fëanor and Sauron as archetypes.  I'll bet Tolkien rubbed elbows with their ilk from the science departments at Oxford!   

This is a very unique and incredibly readable story and so different . You have such a talent. I have often wondered how the Noldor and Sauron created such things of power, including the Silmarils and the Rings of Power, but as I say, I know nothing about science to try and imagine it. 

Many thanks!  I was striving to make it different, and I'm relieved that it is readable!  Creative writing is a fairly new avenue for me since my previous work has focused on scientific articles and bloggy stuff which I guess is something like sloppy journalism. 

The "technology" that went into the Silmarils and the Rings is mysterious, so mysterious that it would appear to be magical, but even though Tolkien invoked the "wave of the wizard's wand" for explanations, he often put a lot of thought behind what "magic" meant.  Sometimes it seems to me (and to others - we've discussed this in other venues - maybe it was in the SWG Yahoo group - if you haven't signed on for that, I heartily recommend it) that Fëanor put part of himself into the Silmarils, not unlike Sauron transferring much of his essence and power into the One Ring.  So maybe there's methodology common to both? 

I am glad you put Glorfindel in it d;-);I also placed his return some little time before the Wars of Eregion, I think I decided on about 1000 SA when Sauron began to build Barad-dur, so that he would be around during those wars. 

Yes, I'm of the "Glorfindel returned to Middle-earth in the Second Age" school and likewise, I imagine he was involved with the War of Sauron and the Elves.   I tried to resist the inclusion of Glorfindel, but my abject fangirlishness (well, fancrone-ishness at my age) kept drawing me back to him.   Of course, I have a typically nerdy vision of him - not just as the famous "Balrog slayer" (snort) but as a bright fellow who entertains himself with advanced calculus and amateur astronomy. I mean, he is a Noldo after all!

I'm going to read it again, as I always read thinsg very fast then sit back and read them more slowly, second time around. Thank you for that story. You have a extremely intriguing - and also believable - outlook on things.  I can certainly believe it, anyway!

Now that is wildly flattering!  Thank you very much for the compliments, Fanari.  

 

I just wanted to drop by to let you know I've not stopped reading this story - well, I have for the moment, but I plan to come back when I have time to read all the remaining chapters at one go, because I know I won't be able to resist.

I just want to add that the descriptions of the journey into the cell and the creation of the strawberry were stunning. And you continue to be consistent in having top-notching writing and characterisation here, of course - bravo!

Be back soon, I hope.  

 

Dawn recommended your work to me a while back and boy, was it ever worth it to look it up! I enjoyed this story immensely. It's strangely satisfying to find fiction that sort of agrees with my thoughts that the Ainur are aliens and the Elves are really just a subspecies of humans. ;) I think you do a great job of blending our time's science (or expanding on what Tolkien himself wrote) with the items and characters Tolkien's world--you explain things so they're more believable to someone like me (a cynical, science-loving nerd, that is ;)), but somehow you still don't "kill the magic." Sámaril's lights were just as wonderful for the way they were created as they would have been if the explanation had simply been "magic," if not more so.  

More than that, this is a wonderful story with wonderfully written characters. Sámaril and Sauron (with all his facets) and everyone else just about jump off the computer screen and come to life before my eyes in your writing. Excellent work! :)

Thanks so much for reading this and for the comments, Sinneahtes!  Upon re-reading Tolkien after a long hiatus, I was amazed by the extraordinary amount of science underlying Tolkien's works.  Much of it is humming along in the background of the Middle-earth operating system but it's there.  Similarly, there are quite a number of scientists and technologists in his world.  I'm especially grateful to hear that I'm not "killing the magic."   That's the peril of injecting science into fan fiction of this milieu.  Although I allow some scientific jargon to slip in there, I figure a well educated Maia formerly-of-Aulë would know these terms; surely there is a word in Valarin for "photosynthesis." :^D

I'm glad you enjoyed Sámaril's lamp project.  The Fëanorian lamps have always fascinated me.  Among Tolkien nerderati,  there have been many discussions concerning their technology ranging from radioactive materials to biolumuniscence as a light source.  I decided to assume the latter and also to assume that Sauron-as-Aulendil would feel he could -- through his student -- create a superior product.  Although I never slogged through swamps with my grad advisor, we did go to conferences together so I might just have drawn upon my experiences there. :^)  Anyway, that whole bit served not only for my own self-indulgence, but also to illustrate Sauron's modus operandi (at least in my 'verse) which was to offer genuinely useful knowledge and thus gain the trust of the Noldorin smiths.

Re:  Ainur are aliens and the Elves are really just a subspecies of humans.

:^D  "...same damned species" might have originated from something I once said.  Maybe.

Based on what Tolkien wrote in The Notion Club Papers, Ainur as aliens is not much of a stretch conceptually!  I'm trying to resist another goofy Valar-as-Great-Old-Ones fic, but Dawn's recent depiction of Námo's flicking serpent tongue is weakening my will power. 

Thanks again, Sinneahtes! 

Ha! I just came here to try to pick up bits and pieces of my previous reviews on this story and use them for my review for the MEFA. Well, apparently, I did not review it yet. I can barely believe that. That sucks. I have to start from the beginning and put my thoughts together all over again. In short: I adored this story. The concepts are brilliant and the characterization soars. I absolutely was taken in my your description of Ost-in-Edhil and how it might have functioned. Oh, darn. Maybe after I write a real review I will cut and paste it back into here.

Heh.  Don't worry about it.  I'm flattered that you and others have read this through so comments and reviews are icing on the cake.  I think I did that with your Maitimo and Findekáno, i.e., wrote a review elsewhere and then pasted it on the SWG later.  Many thanks for the compliments, the ultimate of which was nomination of this story for MEFA.

Oh my, my intent was to read this in one session, but I find myself drinking in these new chapters and every detail. Where the previous chapter with Sauron was just chilling and yet, immensely intriguing, it is such a treat to start at Sámaril's origins, to see what formed him. His eagerness, interaction with his family and his love for them... Every chapter will be treat for me.

Something else that really jumped at me was how you pictured Ost in Edhil in this chapter, simply by written word it just felt as if I could see it in front of my eyes: a mighty city devoted to the arts and crafts of science.

Oh, good!  I'm glad you're reading this!  Even though The Elendilmir could stand alone (I think), The Apprentice puts into context Sámaril's feelings of guilt and also his complex feelings toward his mentor, who, in The Apprentice, is not a cardboard cutout villain.

"...pictured Ost in Edhil in this chapter, simply by written word it just felt as if I could see it in front of my eyes: a mighty city devoted to the arts and crafts of science"

I have to admit that I have long been entranced by those few writings of Tolkien's that concerned Ost-in-Edhil.  The so-called canon that informs me about the city, the Noldor of Eregion and Sauron derives a lot from Tolkien's Letters.  

From Letter 153: "...the Noldor or Loremasters, were always on the side of 'science and technology', as we should call it: they wanted to have the knowledge that Sauron genuinely had..."

From Letter 131: In a letter to Milton Waldman, JRRT wrote of the elven societies in the Second Age: "We hear of a lingering kingdom, in the extreme North-west more or less in what was left in the old lands of The Simarillion, under Gil-galad; and of other settlements, such as Imladris (Rivendell) near Elrond; and a great one at Eregion (emphasis mine) at the Western feet of the Misty Mountains..." 

That suggests to me a city and region of some significance in terms of population and culture, and yep, a culture entranced with the arts and crafts of science.  That letter to Waldman has some interesting comments on Sauron's motivations, some of which have a hint of the Promethean to them, at least until Sauron fell back to his craving for control and power.

Thanks so much, Rhapsy, and I hope you continue to enjoy the story! 

Oh gosh, what to say about this chapter! He has grown, matured a bit and the manner you portray Sauron here. He's so admired and loved, yet he is scheming and manipulating, singling out those who are most receptive to it and have talent for it. This was such a great example on how you handle the darker arts and how Sámaril with such great effort came to understand it. I can see how these arts can be used for good and bad purposes. Must read on!

Oh my goodness... Sauron's manipulation, he simply doesn't know his own limits, does he? And just like that, Sámari risks it all, but speaking to the nervous daughter. This chapter just chilled me to the bone, the foreboding of what is to come, the complete and utter absence of any moral or ethics when it comes down to simply mind reading is just astounding, but even more so, the influence Annatar has on all of them being their mentor shows through here. This just doesn't bode well and still I love Sam, especially when I read: wake up with an erection holding your sheets up like a tent? ;) He's so delightfully down to earth.

"Sauron's manipulation, he simply doesn't know his own limits, does he?"  

 Heh.  He may have his limits, but he won't admit to them easily!  I expect that the process of such exotic delving into materials/organisms is so entrancing to the young scientists smiths that they don't even consider the ethics of what they are doing, or brush it aside (after all, they are Noldor and their subjects are "only" Men), not unlike some researchers in the real world who become so engaged in the "wow-ain't-it-cool" factor that they lose sight of greater ramifications.  And when you have a brilliant mentor, it's sometimes not so easy to see those feet of clay, or if you see them, you deny it.

Re: Sámaril -- yes, he's not exactly an ethereal elf. ;^)

Oh yay! It's so exciting to see Sámaril on the road of discovery! Perhaps I am too immersed in this story, but I felt like bouncing around from happiness with him. :)

And ah Saruman, if all these stories are true, no wonderhe became such a bitter man, striving to equal Sauron during the Ring War. A marvellous chapter again, I think I am addicted.

 

Hmm, this is an intriguing chapter, so Sámaril will be involved with creating the ring of men, thinking that with those rings he can probably restrict this repulsive nature, thinking he will do mankind a favour by doing so. I can understand how Sam will be convinced its a good thing to do (weighing all options carefully), but I wonder how Sauron's betrayal will hit him hard. Yes, there's only one way to find out... *looks for the link for the next chapter*

"You are hopeless, Sámaril. You just don't know how hopeless yet."

This line is just giving me the chills, knowing how spot on Sauron is with this. As a reader I have to watch (it really feels that way) how he's being deceived into making these rings with his skills, yet so fully believing that it will be to the bearer's benefit and the good of mankind. You just sit here and just observe how technology which initially serves a greater good can be used for evil purposes, this is perhaps an ethical question many scientists struggle with, recognising the potential of their skills and how it can be wielded differently if it falls into the wrong hands. The more I read this, worry over Sam (I really like him), it is so hard to see him soaring so high, knowing how deeply he will fall. Also I know I am just a chapter or two away from the end and oh, given my affection for Sam, I am worrying about my hero. This is such a fab story, I am glad that I am taking my time to read this. This is a fine craftmanship of writing. :) 

I really liked the allusions here between the three Hindu gods, as I read a long, I could see that Aulendil would be Brahma, Gothaur the Shiva and the I, who balances in between, as Vishnu. This blind and dangerous ambition, his planning and strategies to re-conquer ME and Arda at the end, plunging them into the Black Hole (right) is just astonishing. Yet you tie all those minor plot lines so neatly together, explaining as to the why and how. Just brilliantly done!

Hahahaha, yes you can get your fangurrrrrrl bumper sticker now. He's a great elf, and yet I reserve my fangurlishness for Sam ;) I think you captured his ashtonishment and his reaction to the most vile betrayals quite well, it is indeed hard to comprehend that if you trusted someone so blindly, would abuse that loyalty so much. I will admit that I had a train of thought that the rings Sam created for his family, also might have fallen under Sauron's thrall, but then he didn't close the matrix there, did he?

What a cruel journey into full adulthood for this elf and I do believe that in your own fantastic way, you portrayed the nature and their thirst for science and knowlegde extremely well.  This was such a ride and a tremendous read.

Rhapsy, thanks so much for reading The Apprentice and for your lively comments!  When I read The Silmarillion and Unfinished Tales for the first time around 30 (!) years ago, I was perplexed: "Why couldn't the Gwaith-i-Mirdain and Celebrimbor in particular have seen through Annatar?"   A number of years of experience as a career scientist in an industry with a dark side and just plain maturity made me realize that the Noldor of Eregion were no fools but neither was Annatar/Sauron. 

On the rings, or at least my take on them:  Sámaril's rings for his family were benign.  And (at least in my 'verse), at least one of the rings that Aulendil crafted (tapping into his "good" creative side) was benign as well.  Remember this?

"In Eregion long ago many Elven-Rings were made, magic rings as you call them, and they were, of course, of various kinds: some more potent and some less. The lesser rings were only essays in the craft before it was full-grown, and to the Elven-smiths they were but trifles -- yet still to my mind dangerous to mortals.” – Gandalf to Frodo, The Fellowship of the Ring. 

I have a rough draft lurking in iBook-Angband about a young hobbit of the Fourth Age who discovers one of Sámaril's "practice" rings in his uncle and aunt's garden  -- a ring that Gandalf might describe as one of those "trifles."  The story is light-hearted, but still emphasizes that these rings were not meant for mortals.  You'd immediately recognize some key characters.

Thanks again, Rhapsy...and also for the MEFA review! 

Hi!  This is the first of your stories that I've ever read and I've enjoyed it very much for so many reasons which I will elaborate for every chapter.  Samaril sounds "hawwt" and is a worthy "break" from my favorite from my favorite Feanorian elves. 

I've added your story to my favorites and I'm glad I got to read this at last.  

Oooh, thanks for taking a chance on this and for "favoriting" this, whitewave!  I'm afraid I do a lot of what might be deemed "wrong" in my take on things Tolkien fan ficcish: original characters, playing with canon, and inflicting my views on the poor reader.  So hat's off to you for keeping an open mind, and taking the ride through Ost-in-Edhil with me...and Sámaril and The Istyar.  And yep, although the Fëanárions et pater may not be overtly present in my fics, their presence is felt.

The first few paragraphs drew me in, even if initially, I found the scientific terms a bit "unusual" for
a Tolkien fanfic.  I'm glad I pressed on.  Despite the many "distracting" passages about the male anatomy
(just kidding), the character's cunning and extreme attention to details seemed to me most promising.
To me, that was what clinched the deal. The way you ended the chapter left me wanting to read more,
which is just what I did and I was definitely not disappointed.

"I found the scientific terms a bit "unusual" for a Tolkien fanfic."

 Heh.  Yes, the Istyar and I don't compromise much in this particular chapter so the sciency stuff stands out.  Hence the categorization of this novella as "science fiction" or "scientifiction" as those in Tolkien's era, including JRRT himself, called it.  It's more integrated as you move along.  Keep in mind that Aulendil has very sophisticated knowledge (I mean, the guy invented steam-driven metal-hulled ships and missiles in Númenor -- see The Lost Road).  He did lose that attention to detail later (re: late Third Age) as he spiraled down into the trap of his own obsession, but that's another story (called The Lord of the Rings, I think ;^)). I also took Tolkien's remarks in one of his letters that the Noldor were always on the side of "science and technology" to heart. :^D

On the masculine traits -- my interpretation of the Maiar is that they really, really like being incarnated whether as human, bear, wolf, spider or eagle.  It's kind of addictive for them.

The title character had me intrigued from the very start--what will become of him? Will he turn to evil?
He's managed to keep my attention even if he is an OMC. 

The introduction of Tyelperinquar and seeing how
Aulendil was doing in Eregion, knowing what he was really up to and what will eventually happen
made for an excellent start of the chapter.  By this time I've managed to lose my initial reservations
about the "scientific" words and have started to feel that they really belong to the story.

Eventhough the Feanorians are not really the focus of the story, I must say I enjoy reading all the "side stories" you wrote about them.  I loved the curve ball question on athelas in this chapter.

I'm glad Sámaril lured you in.  :^) I liked him well enough to put him into a sequel. 

I'm quite partial to OCs, both reading and writing them, as foils and compliments to canon characters and to explore and comment upon them and on overarching themes.  My work certainly will not be everyone's cup of tea (nuanced villain, lack of ye olde archaic language and OCs -- including dreaded and much reviled OFCs -- oh, the horror!) but I'm grateful for those readers (such as yourself) who drink it down!

Many thanks for the comments!  Great to hear that the interweaving of science is working for you -- that was indeed my intent since it seemed pretty clear that the Noldor were the "scientists and engineers" of the Elves.  And hence more prone to "falling."  Oops.

I shared in Samaril's surprise about his initial "minor" tasks. It was a "huh???" moment for me.
Reminded me of the "wax on wax off" bit in Karate Kid--just kidding.  Seriously, I tried to "forget" that I know how things will end for Eregion and Aulendil. 
I was torn between thinking that maybe he's not as evil as Melkor after all.  Or maybe NOT, since Aulendil could read the thoughts of the elves. I loved reading about Samaril's "preening" mode.

" I shared in Samaril's surprise about his initial "minor" tasks. It was a "huh???" moment for me."

Everyone must start with simple tasks in fields of skill.  My grad advisor didn't let me perform complex experiments at first. :^)

"Reminded me of the "wax on wax off" bit in Karate Kid"

LOL!  Great analogy!  Aulendil isn't quite Mr. Miyagi though. :^D 

"I was torn between thinking that maybe he's not as evil as Melkor after all."

According to JRRT, in certain respects he's not, and I'm expanding on that.  Sauron in the LOTR is certainly less-than-ambiguously "evil."  Maybe somewhat less so in  The Silmarillion.  But in the HoMe (see in particular "Myths Transformed"), Tolkien's letters, and even from notes in the Parma Eldalamberon, Tolkien demonstrated noticeably more ambivalence toward this character.  Tolkien noted in one of his letters that Sauron "falls" much further than Morgoth because of his temporary turn to good purpose and intention.

"Or maybe NOT, since Aulendil could read the thoughts of the elves."

Aulendil's ability to "read thoughts" is limited in part due to taking on incarnate form. Maybe he can "skim the surface" more readily than some (and that partly by close observation of subtle facial expressions, body language, etc.) but as per JRRT's remarks pertaining to osanwë-kenta, it's not entirely facile.  I would expect he conceived of the rings as conduits for more defined awareness -- and thereby control -- of others.  

 

I smiled at Aulendil's honesty in his line: "I don't bite, or at least I don't these days..."
His admission of snoring is a nice touch, but later on I had goodsebumps when I read about his moodiness
and coldness. The mention of Aulendil's "loved ones" and his line: "I would have been sent summarily to the
parlor to sleep had I done that at home
," had me intrigued. Is he married or living with someone?

Dawn noted that it figured I'd open up that can of worms. When it comes to controversial subjects, I have no fear. :^D For now I'll just say such a matrimonial state is a heretical issue that I'll address (eventually) in another work. This is not a frivolous notion on my part but a humanized mechanism for commentary on Tolkien's attitudes toward progress (in all its glory and horror) and the creative people who drive it. So stay tuned! :^)

Thanks for replying to all my wordy reviews, I'll be posting this in the MEFA site eventually.  Hope I am still making sense to you.

For this chapter, I loved the anecdotes about Curumo very much plus it is similar to my impression of
Saruman, if Curumo is indeed he (?). 

My favorite line here was: "...He was so stiff and humorless that he made himself an easy target for us.  The braggart yammered on and on about his precision at drawing out a particular alloy.  So one day, we oiled the handle of his hammer...Curumo had to sweet soot for weeks afterwards..." And also that part about Nessa's dance slippers.

Aulendil's remark about the beauty of the countryside struck me as so bittersweet. It seemed to me that he may or may not be "reconsidering" his plans?  His brotherly interaction with Tyelpo in this chapter was  heartbreaking, since we know what's going to happen. 

"Thanks for replying to all my wordy reviews"

No problem.  I'm all about lots of verbiage. ;^) 

"I'll be posting this in the MEFA site eventually"

Many thanks! 

"Hope I am still making sense to you."

Yep, you are.  It's fascinating to see how each reader interprets a story! 

Yes, Curumo = Saruman.  In "Myths Transformed," JRRT wrote that Sauron understood Saruman's mind and behaviors so well because they were much like his own.  I figure it must be that "metals and wheels"  mentality so I'm riffing on an early rivalry when they were "students" of Aulë.  Of course, the Istari have yet to appear in Middle-earth so young Sámaril will have no idea who Aulendil is yammering on about. 

Re: the countryside -- likely regret that he will be leaving his comfortable life behind rather than reconsideration.  I see him as being so self-serving that he's confident that he'll be able to bring the Elves under his control with little resistance on their part or that his influence is so pervasive that they may even be willing to do so.  Yes, he's a bit delusional. ;^) 

 

I liked the line:  "...yet Elven men will not deign to have much to do with these women. Great Yavanna, and you're the same damn species."  Most of the pairings are between elven women and mortal men, well, except maybe Andreth and Aegnor, or a big maybe, Haleth and Caranthir, so Aulendil's concept in this chapter is "refreshing".  

Aulendil's concept is more consistent with actual human behavior, and the elves, as JRRT noted, are human.  I idealize the elves less than JRRT and that's my life scientist's prejudice showing. However, to my mind that indefinite longevity thing certainly sets the Firstborn apart from mortals in a big way and creates major cultural barriers which would preclude a lot of intermarriage. 

It also seems like the biological default setting for the offspring of Elf-Man unions is mortal.  Only by special dispensation can a half-elf become immortal.  So such unions would have the effect of (ahem) diluting the race of the Firstborn or at least that's how some of the "high-caste" Elves might see it.

"Most of the pairings are between elven women and mortal men, well, except maybe Andreth and Aegnor"

Well, those are in the recorded "history." One can approach Tolkien as canon with a set of defined rules and orthodxies or one can approach it as a created mythology which is looser.  I favor the latter approach.  But your mileage may vary.

" big maybe, Haleth and Caranthir"

Fanon, I think, but it's a fanonical concept I like a great deal! That may very well get a passing reference in my WIP sequel.

I think this chapter has the most chilling glimpse of the dark side of Aulendil and his struggle
with it.  It reminded me of a character I read once who had multiple personality disorder.
I felt afraid for Samaril here, I think that he has somehow reached the point where he notices that
something is amiss but just turns a blind eye to it.

Tolkien made a comment to the effect that Sauron took pains to separate his aspects of enemy and tempter so I ran with that.  I figured there was something of a "governor" there, too: a cool, calculating and amoral component of the same person, but still part of the same.

"he has somehow reached the point where he notices that something is amiss but just turns a blind eye to it."

Yep!  That's the human experience of denial, something we can be so adept at, and I figure elves were prone to it, too.  Betrayal by someone one admires or even loves is that much worse than by someone who you might expect to engage in such behavior.

This is my favorite chapter in that Samaril has come a long way both in his talent and in
his interaction with his master. If only Samaril knew just what it was that he made. 
It's just so perfect how it blends with what was written by Tolkien and how you fleshed it out.  
My favorite line is: "You are hopeless, Samaril.  You just don't know how hopeless yet."

Here I found myself thinking what could have appenened had Aulendil submitted to the Valar, it's something I've never thought I'd ever feel for a character like him. I think it was touching that he actually misses the elves, it just adds to his "charm" somehow.  This line gave me goosebumps:  "...Melkor, the heart of darkness, worthy of worship and of sacrifices made on his behalf.  Such worship and sacrifice are among many things that I will bring about when I cast the One."   It convinced me that Aulendil had lost to Gorthaur by his own choice.  

The last encounter of Aulendil/Gorthaur with Samaril was priceless.
I enjoyed this story immensely and even if you changed the characters and "de-Tolkienized" it I'd
probably still enjoy it. I can compare it to a delicious nine-course dinner that has all the right stuff--drama, comedy, tragedy and hope. There are points where I am torn between analyzing just what it was that drew me in and just sitting back and enjoying the story as it unfolds. I am satisfied with how you tied the loose ends but could not help but wish for more so it was great that you wrote a sequel.
Thanks very much for sharing this.