Before the Darkness by chrissystriped

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Chapter Two

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After the warmth outside it was dark and cool in the stable. It smelled of horse and leather. Mablung looked around. He had no reason to be here – especially on his day off – and he expected someone to ask him, what he was doing here any moment now. He didn’t know if he’d have the guts to say that Glorfindel invited him for a ride. Everyone in Tirion knew what reputation Glorfindel had.

He and his friends weren’t picky with who to take into their beds and the way Glorfindel had touched his lip at the party... Mablung knew what he wanted to do with him. Or, he didn’t know exactly. He knew that it had something to do with kissing and touching each other. He had interrupted his parents once, when he had been little, but he hadn’t seen a lot and also, Glorfindel and he were both men. It couldn’t be like it worked with women.

When he started to wonder, if Glorfindel would even come, someone blocked the light coming from the entrance to the stable.

“Mablung, how nice to see you.”

Mablung’s eyes had grown accustomed enough to the twilight to see the smile on Glorfindel’s face. He smiled back. “Thank you for the invitation, Glorfindel.”

“You’re welcome. Let’s find a horse for you.”

“You can just lend one?”

“A lot of them belong to the crown and yes, I have the right to take one of those.”

Glorfindel walked along the boxes and looked at the animals. “Yes, I think, Menelluin is a good choice. She’s very gentle and calm.”

Mablung caressed the soft nose of the chestnut mare that looked at him with intelligent eyes. Glorfindel gave him a comb.

“Grooming her will help you make friends with her. I’ll tend to Súrion, only a few boxes further down, if you need me.”

Menelluin stood still as he groomed her, only her skin twitched now and then when a fly landed on her. Mablung relaxed. It was almost a hypnotic feeling, the calmness of the horse and the quiet sound of the comb on its coat. He had been surprised that Glorfindel seemed to clean his horse himself, there were grooms for this, after all. He’d just been too polite to ask. Now he understood. Horses always had seemed a little scary to him, they were such big animals, but now he felt just calm.

Glorfindel softly cleared his throat and Mablung looked at him. “Finished?”

Mablung smiled wryly. “I guess.”

Glorfindel grinned knowingly and didn’t comment on his absentmindedness. He showed him how to check Menelluin’s hooves and how to saddle her. Súrion stood nearby, already saddled, and seemed to watch curiously.

“We’ll walk out of town. Menelluin is very relaxed but it’s always possible for something unexpected to happen in town. If she should bolt, don’t try to hold her. Don’t wrap the reins around your hand, just hold them so she knows that you want her to come with you.”

Mablung nodded and followed Glorfindel out of the stable and through the palace gate. The horses’ hooves clopped on the cobblestoned street. Glorfindel chose the longer switchback road, they couldn’t lead the horses down the stairs.

“You are in Prince Turgon’s service, aren’t you?”, Glorfindel asked.

“Yes. I... do everything, I’m needed for.” Mablung shrugged abashed.

“Don’t be ashamed.” Glorfindel seemed to have noticed his unease. “There’s nothing dishonourable in being a servant.”

“Hm”, Mablung made. He’d rather have done something else. He didn’t know exactly what, but not this. Something, where he felt free. Maybe own a mountain farm like grandmother Finya. “I just like it more to be outside.”

“Maybe you should ask the elf who cleans the windows from outside to take you as apprentice.” Glorfindel grinned at him. Mablung looked down. Was he making fun of him? “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to insult you”, Glorfindel said, regret in his voice. “I’m an oaf.”

“No, you aren’t.” Mablung realised that Glorfindel probably wasn’t talking to people like him that often. “Your friends would have thought this funny, I think.”

“Yes, they would have, but you aren’t them. I’m sorry.” Glorfindel seemed honestly contrite so Mablung shrugged.

“It’s okay. Maybe you are even right.” He liked to climb after all... His mother would kill him, if he hinted that he’d like to climb up the palace.

They had left the city and Glorfindel led him off the street. He stopped close to a boulder that had at some time fallen down from the mountains.

“Climb on the stone and mount from there.”

Mablung frowned. He was a little short maybe, but he was sure that he could get on the horse without help. Glorfindel smiled at the face he made.

“I don’t say this because you are short. To the contrary, the fact that you are small and lightweight would justify letting you mount from the ground. It’s like this:” Glorfindel turned his stirrup and put his foot in. “If I’d mount like this, for a moment my whole weight would rest on one side of the horse, the saddle pulls on the spine and that’s not good. You should always mount from a raised position if you can. So, get up on that boulder.”

Mablung obeyed while Glorfindel held Menelluin’s reigns.

“Now, brace yourself on the saddle and swing your leg over her back... yes, good.”

Mablung wiggled about on the saddle and searched the stirrups with his feet. It was a strange feeling. Less the height than the fact that he sat on a living being that constantly moved a little despite standing still.

“Are you ready?”

Mablung nodded doubtfully and Glorfindel started walking.

He led him around the meadow for a while, instructed him how to sit and move until Mablung felt like he wasn’t swaying that much anymore. Finally Glorfindel gave him the reigns and mounted Súrion. Glorfindel had shown him the basic aids, but Mablung was glad that Menelluin seemed to follow Súrin on her own. He had to concentrate enough to stay in the saddle and adjust to her rhythm. Glorfindel smiled at him.

“Do you like it?”

Mablung nodded. “Thank you for this. I’m sure it looks differently when you go for a ride on your own.”

Glorfindel laughed. “Yes, true, but I don’t mind. I can always spend time with Súrion.” He patted the stallion’s neck. “But this day I wanted to spend with you.”

Mablung felt himself blush. He hated this. As if he couldn’t manage to do anything else than change skin-colour and nod in Glorfindel’s presence.

“May I ask you, how old you are, Mablung?”

Mablung bit his lip. He’d hoped he wouldn’t ask. He wouldn’t want to spend time with him once he knew. He’d be only a child in his eyes.

“Sixteen”, he mumbled.

Glorfindel seemed to be dumbfounded for a moment, he only nodded and Mablung felt a cold weight in his belly.

“And your parents let you walk to Alqualonde alone?”

Mablung looked surprised at him.

"You said, your friends are from there."

"Oh, yes." He shrugged. “I’ve always been running around a lot. I mostly don’t ask.”

He was constantly fighting with his father because of that. His mother was different, she allowed him his freedom. Maybe because she had grown up like that, too. She had only moved to the town when she married his father. Her parents were gardeners and although she’d had to help a lot, she had always been free to play.

“I... need that”, Mablung said. “I get restless, when I can’t be outside.” He shook his head. “That must sound childish.”

“No, not at all.” Glorfindel smiled at him. “I’m just surprised that you bother with an old man like me.”

Mablung huffed. “You are Glorfindel Los’loriol! And you aren’t old. How old are you, anyway?” He could ask that, too.

Glorfindel laughed. “Sixty-three.”

He drew breath to say something else but Mablung stopped him. “Please don’t say something like: ‘I could be your father.’ I don’t want to hear that.”

Glorfindel grinned. “I don’t want to even think that. That would mean I have a wife.”

Mablung gave him a surprised look. “Don’t you want one?”

Of course there was talk that Glorfindel only went after men. And of course Mablung knew that he himself found men a lot more appealing than women, but... marrying, having children. Wasn’t that what you did?

Glorfindel looked seriously at him. “I have the highest respect for most women. There are intelligent women, beautiful women, talented women. But I don’t think them attractive in a sexual way. No, I don’t think that I’ll marry a woman. Maybe you are too young to understand...”

"No!” Mablung hated nothing more than to be thought too young. He understood more than adults thought. “I know what you mean. I... don’t like girls. Well, I like some of them, but not like that. As you said.” He bit his tongue because he noticed that he sounded as young as he was. “I don’t look at girls like I look at boys. It’s just... Isn’t that what is expected? The way things are?”

Glorfindel shrugged. “I don’t care for what people expect. Should I ever meet the One, I’m pretty sure that he’ll be a man. Until then I intend to have as much fun as possible – that doesn’t meet expectations either, by the way – and I advise you to do the same.” Glorfindel winked at him. “Although you maybe should wait a few more years.”

Mablung felt himself blush, again. He didn’t want to wait. He... he wanted Glorfindel to kiss him.

“How old were you?”, he blurted out.

Glorfindel chuckled. “You are quite a curious one, aren't you? When I had sex for the first time? Forty or so. When I was intimate with someone for the first time?” Glorfindel cocked his head. “Not that much older than you are now.”

 

Glorfindel saw Mablung licking his lips – how he looked at him. He was aware that the boy – Valar, he really was that – found him attracting. But it was also obvious that he had no idea what he was longing for. Glorfindel on the other hand knew exactly what he would have liked to do with him. If he had been just a little older, he’d have seduced him in the hayloft after their ride, but sixteen... that was too young, even for him.

He was sure that Mablung would have let him do anything he wanted. Sixteen! Yes, his body might be that of an adult, but his mind had still to learn a lot. Glorfindel was very conscious of how much he could hurt him. He didn’t want that and he didn’t want it said of him that he seduced children. He could wait, even forty years – or maybe a little less. Or...

Back at the stable, Glorfindel gave the horses’ reigns to a groom and laid his hand on Mablung’s back, leading him outside.

“It was a very nice afternoon”, he said.

Mablung smiled at him and leaned towards him. “It was, Glorfindel. Thank you very much.”

He wanted to be kissed, Glorfindel could tell by looking at him. And if he refused him now... who knew if he would want him in forty years.

Glorfindel pulled him to a quiet corner of the courtyard where no one would see them. He didn’t care for long relationships, it only complicated things. He didn’t want to raise expectations, but it couldn’t hurt to keep on the right side of the boy.

“Maybe we could repeat this sometime?”, he said softly and kissed Mablung’s cheek. The boy trembled when he took his chin and kissed along his jaw. “I’d like it very much to get to know you better.”

“I... me, too.”

Mablung took a shivering breath and Glorfindel could imagine vividly what was happening between his legs just now, but he kept his hands away from there. Kissing was fine, but he wouldn’t go further.

“But I don’t have free days that often.”

“Don’t worry about that.” Glorfindel winked at him. Maybe he could pull a few strings.

 

~*~*~

 

Mablung lay on his bed, his trousers pulled down to his knees, his shirt unbuttoned. His parents were at a party and Liriel visited a friend, he hadn’t to worry about getting caught, but he still had jammed a chair under the door handle – you never knew. He was stroking his arousal with one hand, the other played with his nipples. He imagined that it were Glorfindel’s hands that touched him.

They had went for a ride again today, he slowly got better, although he always walked a little awkwardly the day after, his muscles weren’t used to it. They had dismounted at a brook to let the horses drink and sat down in the grass. Glorfindel had kissed him again. His cheeks, his eye lids, his neck and Mablung had followed his example, had even dared to suck on his earlobe – Glorfindel had liked that. Mablung moaned as a pleasant shiver coursed through him at the thought.

“Glorfindel”, he whispered. He wanted him so much. Mablung stroked himself more quickly, imagined Glorfindel’s blue eyes watching him while he made him come. Mablung gasped, coming over his hand and thighs. His heart thrummed in his chest. “Glorfindel...” If only... He had insinuated that he thought Mablung too young, but why then did he bother with him at all?

Mablung at any rate didn’t think himself too young. His body was able to do this, so he was ready for sex, wasn’t he? He wasn’t a child anymore. He hoped, Glorfindel would come to see that – he longed so much to touch him.

 

A servant stopped Glorfindel when he came home, telling him that Ecthelion was waiting in the parlour. Glorfindel quickened his steps, hurrying to his rooms and changing his riding clothes for one of the embroidered jackets he liked to wear at court. He was attracting attention with this and that was his intent, he liked being seen.

Ecthelion had helped himself to a glass of white wine and skimmed through one of the romances Glorfindel’s mother left lying about everywhere, a look of disgusted fascination on his face. He closed the book when Glorfindel came in and threw it back on the table.

“How can anyone take those things seriously, it’s oozing with goo!” He sniffed. “You smell like horse. Have you been riding?”

“Yes”

He hadn’t taken time to wash and the smell of horse was hanging in his hair.

“Alone?” Ecthelion wiggled his eyebrows.

“With Mablung.” Glorfindel poured himself a glass of wine and sat beside his friend.

“Again?” Ecthelion’s eyebrows wandered further up. “Are we in love now, or what?”

“No!” Glorfindel shook his head. “Of course not.”

“Why are you taking so much time with him. He’s just a servant. You want him, you have obviously wrapped him around your finger, take him.” Ecthelion shrugged. “What are you waiting for?”

“He’s only sixteen!” Glorfindel put his glass down more violently than he had wanted. “I can’t just fuck him. He wouldn’t understand it.”

“His own fault, if he’s so premature, I’d say. It’s about fun, Glorfindel, don’t forget that. Don’t bother with a boy.”

Fun, yes. Glorfindel wouldn’t admit to Ecthelion that he had fun riding out with Mablung. Mablung’s company, far away from those petty quarrels at court.

He even liked the innocent kisses they were sharing. Yes, they left him frustrated, but he was ready to pay that price. Ecthelion wouldn’t understand that, he didn’t really understand it himself, if he was honest. Mablung was adorable, yes, but also naive and immature. He was only sixteen after all, although Glorfindel could see that he wanted to seem older than he was.

Maybe it was this naivety, this blind trust in him, that touched him so much. He didn’t want to fail Mablung. Mablung worshipped him like a hero, he didn’t want him to look at him like some of his former lovers did. People, who had wanted more from him than he wanted to give. He didn’t lie to anyone about his intents, but some people didn’t want to believe the truth until it slapped their faces. Mablung wasn’t like this, Mablung was much too inexperienced, he wouldn’t abuse his trust. But he couldn’t tell Ecthelion all this.

Instead he just shrugged. “It doesn’t always have to be about sex. I simply like the boy.”

Ecthelion huffed and mumbled something unintelligible, but didn’t contest him. “I have an appointment with the seamstress tomorrow. Do you want to come?”, he changed topic.

“I shouldn’t...” Glorfindel knew that he would spend much too much money if he did. She always had so wonderful fabrics.

“But you want to.” Ecthelion winked at him. “Let me tempt you.”

“Well... all right. I’ll come.” Glorfindel admitted to himself, that he wanted to be tempted.