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Oh, Elleth!  This is just...harrowing, a very dark and compelling premise, that these youngsters would be abandoned in the fanaticism that surely must have consumed their parents. 

The idea of utter darkness and how alien that would be is horrific enough, but frank exploration as you and Dawn (Work of Small Hands) have done is amazing.   Calassë's disaster with her soup, and her quandry about feeding her baby brother?  Gripping.  I'm drawn to fiction about dystopian settings, and holy moly, this chapter is right. there.

This is especially chilling:

It is not only the pollution of Melkor and Ungoliant, but now that the Trees can no longer dissolve them, fogs are also drifting in from the sea. Both are mingling, and falling down as this dirty rain. It would be best if we did not expose ourselves to it.


Eeeeeeesh.   And Coiviengolmor?  YAY!

In other words, well done!  I'm riveted!

 

Thank you so much! I'd be lying if said I weren't thrilled that you're enjoying this, especially since I had my doubts about the reception of this chapter, pleased as I was with the way it turned out - a young OFC, and shining such a close light on her for that frank exploration (as opposed to someone better-known and loved like Eärwen)? Eeesh. So reading this is balm for my poor writerly soul :^D, thank you so much! This is going to stay dystopic for quite a while, and it's going to get worse before it's going to get better, so I hope I can keep you hooked. Wouldn't want to imply that the Darkening was an easy time, after all! 

One really feels for Calassë when reading this--one thing after another, and then that grotty rain on top of it all.

I really liked the first Nerdanel section. The descriptions of all the different statues, and the various possible means of obliteration, are very memorable. 

Great story. Now I'm speculating on whether the sections shall continue to parallel each other, or if ever the two shall meet.

It's definitely a case of far too much on Calassë's poor shoulders at the moment, and the rain is decidedly not helping - and I'm glad you're enjoying Nerdanel's section as well. Her next chapter will be going up on Saturday, and I'll keep alternating until... [spoilery mumble here]. :) 

Thank you so much!

Poor Calassë! Everything she's going through feels very, very real. It's hard to read because you aren't flinching from the realities of the situation, and that's a good thing.

It is not only the pollution of Melkor and Ungoliant, but now that the Trees can no longer dissolve them, fogs are also drifting in from the sea. Both are mingling, and falling down as this dirty rain. It would be best if we did not expose ourselves to it.”

This sent chills down my spine.

I'm looking forward to the next chapter!

Thank you, Indy! It was quite hard for me not to flinch; there are future chapters I actually decided to cut on because they seemed a little /too/ much in terms of shock value (rather than the emotional component, which I'm hoping I kept intact). 

I'm thrilled, too, that the pollution is coming across so well! I like it much better than the Unlight only (it's dark already, after all!) and there's plenty of canonical backing for actual physical impact on the environment by evil; I like it a lot because it does begin to feel less numinous that way. 

Next chapter is due Saturday if all goes according to plan! :)

The heartbreak in that scene felt very real when I was writing it, too. It's such a fraught situation, and then something goes wrong that ought to be relatively simple... poor girl. I'm glad you brought up Máriel in this, because she is going to become quite important in the long run. :) 

And I have caught up.   This is a viscerally dark story, Elleth, and I am relishing it.  I love the parallel storylines of the abandoned youngsters and Nerdanel, Anairë, Nerdanel's family (I have always enjoyed your stories of Nerdanel and her family, and there's so much continuity here), Pelorë, and Ravennë, hinted at, but so present.  The atmosphere you've captured is fantastic - a dark magical realism - and you know how much I appreciate that.  Oh, and pulling that imagery from the Book of Lost Tales?  Fantastic!

 Yes, the world-building is excellent, but the characterizations rule all.   I'm an absolute pushover for original characters, and Máriel and Calassë are wonderfully drawn. 

OMG!  The descriptions of the light failing!  Those were excellent.  And have I mentioned how much I like the concept of the Coiviengolmor"  Have I?  Have I? ;^)

As I have said before...this is a harrowing tale, and in the best possible way.

Thank you so much, Pande! I'm glad the updates appealed and that the parallel structure keeps working for you. And I'm not even going to pretend I wasn't delighted that you brought up the continuity question - way to tickle my ego, because I'm very much enjoying the attempt to populate my version of the Legendarium and make it internally coherent. (Still waiting for the day when I conclude that it's absurd. ;^D).

I've been pulling some things from the Lost Tales, yes! :) I still adore the level of detail and vividness that went into them, and given that my fic likes to go up close and personal it seemed like the logical chocice to draw from the more detailed accounts, if 'updated' to better fit the tone I was trying to go for. That was the easiest part of the writing, to be quite honest! In some ways, as much as I adore my characters, 'harrowing' applies to the rest of the process as well. ;)

I don't know what else to say, other than making delighted noises that the outcome works for you. Thank you!