Begging and betrayal by ford_of_bruinen

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Fanwork Notes

Written for lady elleth who wanted a poem based around the following qoute.

"[Nerdanel] retired to her father's house; but when it became clear that Fëanor and his sons would leave Valinor for ever, she came before him before the host started on its northward march, and begged that Fëanor should leave her the two youngest, the twins, or at least one of them. He replied: "Were you a true wife as you had been till cozened by Aulë, you would keep them all, for you would be coming with us. If you desert me you desert also all of our children. For they are determined to go with their father." Then Nerdanel was angry and she answered: "You will not keep all of them. One at least will never set foot on Middle-earth." "Take your evil omens to the Valar who will delight in them," said Fëanor. "I defy them." So they parted."

Fanwork Information

Summary:

A poem about the last meeting of Nerdanel of Feanor according to HoMe

Major Characters: Fëanor, Nerdanel

Major Relationships:

Artwork Type: No artwork type listed

Genre: Poetry

Challenges:

Rating: General

Warnings:

Chapters: 1 Word Count: 250
Posted on 29 September 2007 Updated on 29 September 2007

This fanwork is complete.

Begging and betrayal

Read Begging and betrayal

Rarely I saw
through the veil of times to come
but this time,
in this madness
and everlasting darkness,
I saw a glimpse
of what was to be.

And so I went to him
who my heart still desired,
he who had once shone brighter
than the two trees combined.
I came to him pleading,
begging for mercy,
not for myself
but for my youngest sons.

His eyes shone of hurt and fury
that I would beg for them
but not for him.
Yet I knew I could no longer leash him,
no longer offer calm
to his fiery spirit,
he was too strong for me.

He blamed my choice
to return to my father
to desert not only him
but the sons I had borne,
he did not understand
that his fire consumed me
drank my soul
as it had once drunk his own mother's

When he threw my choice in my face,
his voice colder than ice,
spitting out his hatred for one
that had broken oaths and kinship
like I had
my calm broke.
I told him then what I had seen
that were he to take the youngest from me
he would slay a son
for one, I did not know which,
would never set foot
on the other shore.
He would be lost
and damned
by the choice they had made

He laughed at me then
taunting me to hide
in my father's house
under the protection of the Valar.
Our sons would go with him
and not with me
and my omens, my sight,
was no more
than female hysterics.

Then he turned and left
while I struggled for words
to convince him
of the truth, of reason, of calm.
I stood frozen
and once I found the words,
the strength to move,
they were gone
and my youngest son
would die.


Comments

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I read this poem a few days back, at your LJ feeling a bit at loss what to say. This poem carries so much pain and feeling of defeat: it is overwhelming (in a good way). I think what adds to it is the meter in this poem, delivering the message in a strong way. In a way it is just like that, I hear her talking to me, accentuating those words and moments that hurt her the most. Maybe I’ve been listening to much musicals off late, but this piece has the feeling of one. This is a great poem Uli!

Thank you :) I am very glad you enjoyed it. I have to admit that the idea of writing this one scared me seeing it was built around such a specific qoute but once i started writing it just flowed. I don't think I did any tweaking at all, it just appeared in a state where I felt playig with it would have weakened it

*hugs* 

 

thanks for the fb 

Well, what can I say? I would like to offer constructive criticism, but... wow. The poem, despite being so strongly based on the quote I asked for, has a life of its own. You definitely managed to bring the feelings of the moment across perfectly. It's a painful, sad, dark moment, and your work takes all that and makes it more magnificent (not the right word in this context) - wow.   

Thank you so much for writing this! *hugs*

I am very glad you enjoyed the poem :) I admit when I first looked at the qoute my instinct was to scream HELP! and run *lol* But once I started writing it it cames suprisingly easy, possibly because I love that whole bit in the HoMe and knew it well already and possibly because I always felt a great sympathy for Nerdanel.

Thank you for the challange and so glad it was what you wanted

*hugs*