Unrequited by elfscribe

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Fanwork Notes

 

 

Fanwork Information

Summary:

A lovesick Daeron crafts a new song to try to gain Lúthien's attention.

A triple drabble (300 words)

MEFA 2010 First Place Winner:  Genres: Fixed Length

Major Characters: Daeron, Elu Thingol, Lúthien Tinúviel, Melian

Major Relationships:

Genre: Romance

Challenges:

Rating: General

Warnings:

Chapters: 1 Word Count: 297
Posted on 22 April 2010 Updated on 22 April 2010

This fanwork is complete.

Chapter 1 - Unrequited

Read Chapter 1 - Unrequited

By twos and threes they came, the children of Ilúvatar, treading through the warm summer night, glittering like fireflies, silky robes billowing. With gentle laughter they gathered  to hear Daeron, the master harper, who, it was said, could charm a song from the wind.

Tall, silver-haired Elu Thingol came, holding his queen, fair Melian, by the hand, their ancient love shiny as spring leaves. They nodded at Daeron, who sat on the dais, hands poised over the strings of his harp, yearning for what they wore so lightly.

Last came Lúthien, beloved of her people, cloud of black hair falling untamed about her shoulders, eyes brighter than the evening star. Briefly, she glanced at Daeron, holding him enthralled. Just for her, he had crafted a new song, laboring long into the night. It must be perfect.

Expectant stillness.

Tenderly, he plucked the strings, releasing a cascade of crystal notes and the crowd sighed.  In a voice purer than silver, sweeter than a nightingale, he sang of Cuiviénen in the morning of the world, of shining waterfalls that widened into clear pools, and foamed, flower-laden, towards the sea. There, in the hidden dells the awakening Firstborn touched their own faces and knew they were alive. The gladsome tune changed to a minor key and Daeron sang of a fair maid dwelling by the waters, who had captured a youth’s heart, and because she knew it not, paid him no heed. Overhead wheeled the canopy of stars as he sang of longing and love unrequited until his listeners’ hearts were wounded and their cheeks wet.

He bowed his head, his song ended.  A beat of silence, then, a tumult of applause.

He sought her approving glance, but of all those admiring faces, only she looked past him, perceiving another melody from afar.   

~end~

Comments

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This was just beautiful: such strong images and the ending line was perfect! I loved this line: "the awakening Firstborn touched their own faces and knew they were alive." There are stories where I feel like I can sink into the words and be transported where the author takes me, and this is certainly one of them.

I still love and adore this story so very much. You captured two of my favorite characters beautifully. I wish I was able to hear Daeron's song. You make it sound so lovely and magical with your words. This is so powerful and captivating with even just a short story. Thank you so very very much for this, Elfscribe. I'll treasure this story always. "hugs"

Copy of my MEFA review:

A beautifully crafted piece in which every single word bears its weight. In the Silmarillion itself, Daeron can appear a slightly pathetic creature, despite the praise heaped upon his professional skill. But in this story, the true quality of his minstrelsy is felt and the pain caused by Luthien's rejection becomes palpable.

Hi Himring.  Thanks for the very nice compliment.  In the Silm, Daeron is a tragic figure of unrequited love, portrayed as a consummate musician and loremaster, inventor of runes, but we don't actually see much of him doing these things.  I thought it would be nice to give him his shining moment.  

I haven't read much Daeron fic myself (perhaps it's the way he's been portrayed in canon, in the Silm at least), but I feel sorry for him here; I can imagine how crushed I would be if I'd worked so hard on something only to have it ignored by the person it was intended for.

hands poised over the strings of his harp, yearning for what they wore so lightly.

This is genuinely sad. It sort of makes me wonder if he was lonely in Doriath... *cue plotbunny*

until his listeners’ hearts were wounded and their cheeks wet.

A lovely sentence here.

Hi!  I was just browsing and this caught my eye - I like Daeron, and he often seems to get overlooked.  Anyway, it's a gorgeous piece; his song made me feel teary even though I was reading about it, not hearing it, and the end is perfect.  Congratulations.