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This is turning out to be promising, I quite liked your insights and commentary into Finwe's character particularly. "I think that he simply thought that those who disagreed with him did not yet fully understand him." - very good, very good. 

I can't think of many stories that deal with Valinor in this time, involving these characters - heck, I can't name any. *g* Thanks for giving them the spotlight; I've always found the dynamics between Finwe's children to be rather intriguing.

But, okay, I need to get all annoying-fangirly here - you've got Finarfin, Indis, even Findis - will we find out what happened to Fingolfin's wife? In my defense, I wouldn't have wondered if it wasn't for Elrond being described as Idril's grandson; and I've been having the House of Fingolfin in my head and seeing Idril's name sparked the association for me. *g*

Hope to come back to this soon. 

Hi Klose,

 Going back to your first review, now: I'm glad you approve of how I'm depicting Finwë.  I'm trying to be careful to keep him within the boundaries of goodness, which Tolkien clearly seemed to think he was, while allowing for some less-than-perfect qualities, which seems necesary given the turmoil his family went through.  Besides, no one is a saint -- how boring that would be!

Okay, first of all - I seemed to have spoken (written?) too soon about Anaire, so ignore that part of my last review. ;)

Second of all, I found myself vigorously agreeing with Indis as she yelled at Finwe about Feanaro and whatnot; her arguments were most similar to those Fingolfin was raging about the same timeframe in one of my perpetual WiPs.

However, I did not expect the twist - Finwe talking about the 'truth' - my goodness, the unease was building for me as I continued reading, even as it did for Indis - very good portrayal of tension.

But... OMG. Where do I even start? I'm shocked and amazed, in an awesomely good way. The layers to your characters and the complexities of their relationships is delicious.

Well, I never get tired of exclaiming how much I love stories involving family dynamics. I started watching a wonderful TV show that did this really well, everything stemming from the patriarch's death and the revelation of all the secrets he kept from his family and the lies he told them, and of course the loveable and appropriately dysfunctional family hangs together despite it all. But there are lots of tears and upsets in between - and I got such a strong sense of all those myriad complexities in this scene, and in the face of the slight correlation of 'sins of the father' (almost) that i got between the chapter and the show, and I just had to mention it. (Basically, I am trying to say that this is awesome. In my world, comparing anything to a favourite TV show is a high compliment. :D Yes, I'm weird like that. *g*) 

We seem to have similar ideas on many things, and yet you've taken things a further level and made this story and the characterisations your own - so in a lot of ways, I feel like I can recognise the characters, and yet I'm also learning more about them as I continue reading. It's quite marvellous!

One thing I realised and appreciated from this chapter is the closeness of Indis and Findis; I did wonder about it earlier, but I see it here in a way that I can relate to. Mothers and daughters tend to be close in the way that Indis and Findis are, and more so first-born daughters - and with these circumstances, there's a lot of room for bonding, certainly. (This has got me thinking a lot about how I myself see the characters - you've inspired me, I guess, and I love being inspired by other peoples' fanfiction. :D)

Another thing I realised is how *well* you do dialogue. You've  used it so well here to explore all the problems, relationships and character-dynamics of Two-Trees-Tirion. "I’m afraid that Nolofinwë and Arafinwë took their father’s preference for Fëanáro as evidence of their own shortcomings." - is just one great, thoughtful line. And besides, it's just really vibrant, evocatively written dialogue. :)

Thanks, Klose!  I'm my mother's oldest daughter, and she was her mom's oldest daughter (we lived in the same village as my grandmother so we saw her a lot), so maybe that informed my view of how Findis would be with Indis.  There's a lot of unspoken understanding, I think, that's weird to "outsiders" (like my poor dad, with no sons, just daughters!).

 Thanks a lot for your kind words about the dialogue.  This is my first time writing fiction and I was worried about that aspect.

Oh god, I felt my heart breaking reading about young Feanor and Findis, inching towards that inevitable mistake - sigh. Well, you've made me feel a bit of sympathy towards Feanor, and not many people have been able to do that to me these days - this is so sad, but utterly believable as an event in itself and as a catalyst for later events.

On another note, I enjoyed the first bit about Galadriel and Celeborn! 

Well, since I'm on a bit of a reading-and-reviewing roll (well, this is good for in-between breaks while practicising a presentation I have tomorrow!) - but *gasp*! I did not expect that, at all. It's good that I've got a next chapter to hit immediately, or else the waiting would be evil. *g*

I'm curious as to why Indis and the others haven't heard about this till now - and yet Melian speaks as if it's common knowledge.  

Holy cow!  So many really wonderful, helpful reviews that make me glad I finally decided to take the plunge and try my hand at writing.  I just logged on for a second between a late lecture and dinner, in order to add this story to the Strong Women Challenge -- and I was delighted to find your reviews, Klose!  Thank you sooo much!  I want to respond to each, since you so kindly took the time to share your thoughts with me.  But time only permits me to respond to this one right now.

 Do you think that it's implausible that Indis wouldn't have known about Míriel's re-housing?  As I recall, after she was back among the living, Míriel stood for a while at the edge of Loríen, considering her options, and then went back to Mandos to enter in Vairë's service. I didn't have the impression that she spoke to any Elves.  Is that wrong?  But if that's a reasonable assumption, I can imagine none of the Valar thinking to tell Indis ... because the Valar do seem to be a bit thick sometimes.  Clearly, Melian was surprised that Indis never knew!  Melian, based on my memory, retreated to Valinor and then mostly hung around Mandos, mourning Thingol.  So she wouldn't have encountered Indis, who never went to Mandos to seek news of her husband.  That was my thinking anyway.

  

Ah and here we have Findis making her entry. She seems not to show all of her to Finarfin, with her sound opinion about matters. The way you wrote the family dynamics, with Findis as a 2nd child, but first one of Finwë and Indis, it makes her position rather different, as if perhaps Fëanor himself longed for a sister or that she did not pose as much as a threat to him. Hmm, I have to read on to see if this comes to light :)

Oh yay, an update! :D

This turns of this conversation surprised me - I thought I knew what might be discussed, but this is so much better. Indis was dangerously close to gratuitous self-pity - but I like how Nienna's skilful direction of the conversation turned out. Yes, Indis might have brought her own mistakes into the mix, and yet they are so relatable, so understandable. I think this is a significant turning point for her. 

Sorry - I'm a bit tired and lacking in sleep as my exams are approaching, but I figured an incoherent review is better than no review? ;)  

Wow, these chapters with Miriel and Indis talking have really not disappointed - as always, your great insight and original perspectives on the characters and their relationships fascinates and strikes a chord with me. What I like most, I think, is that everyone is very much flawed, and yet you help us relate to *all* of them. Reading the Silmarillion, and writing fanfiction about it, I think that it's very easy to be biased to certain characters at the expense of giving the others a fair treatment. I myself am guilty of that, I will admit - so this story has been particularly instrumental in making me empathise with Feanor and Miriel (oh yes, definitely Miriel - I relate so much to how tired and stifled she must have felt the months after Feanor's birth). I particularly enjoyed Miriel's reminsicence about Feanor, and that his first word was 'light' (very appropriate!). In her description of this simple thing, it's easy to see the love she had for her son.

At the same time, I am blown away by your portrayal of Finwe, who you've masterfully shown to be a three-dimensional character with great depth, and such traits and hubris and creativity that we see in his children also. And all this even though he doesn't actually appear in the story, other than by memory and recollection!

Once again, very well done - as always, I look forward to more!  

Thanks a lot, Klose!  I'm trying to not be too heavy-handed, biased, or maudlin with any of the characters.  And above all, I'm trying for fairness, especially for those characters that I was initially inclined to view in a dim light.  I agree that the Silmarillion does not lend itself to an even-handed understanding of its characters.  Some, like Finrod, are just obviously awesome and cool.  I've always liked Fëanor (always a sucker for a bad boy!) but of course you can't overlook the fact that he was just terrible sometimes.  I don't want to give him a pass for that, but just to provide a bit of perspective.  And the same for Finwë, Míriel and Indis -- the Silmarillion and other Tolkien writings give only the merest sketches of what went on.  The seeds of this story were my thoughts about what made Míriel abandon her life, and it's taken me a while to get there, so I'm really glad to know that it seems plausible to you.  Thanks so much for taking the time to review!

Hi,

I am granting you the gift of my first review on this site (ah but is that a good thing!)!

 I think this is a beautiful opening to an intersting theme, I really like the way you have portrayed Indis as the gentle grandmother, who is non-questioning. I also like the way you showed Finarfin as a young elf again, intentionally or not, excited at his only daughters return.

So far, this is very good and I am looking forward to reading the rest of it.

 

Lindale

Ai! Poor Indis!

 

Which grandchild remained in the East? or was Lalwen's son Glorfindel? That is a connection I have though about, but not know if anyone else had.

 I loved the flashback to between Finwe and Indis, it was very, dramatic, I think that would be the best way to describe it.

 

Lindale

Beautiful.

You have shown Finwe in an extremly compromising position. But also Miriel and Indis, they all ended up in difficult positions.

I empathise alot more with Miriel and her suffering now, because you addresed the point of not leaving for selfish reasons, which is what alot of people come to believe becasue they have never considered the other options.

 Finwe is shown as a flawed but brilliant, simply through recollections!

 Well done, incredible well written and a masterly piece of writing.

 Lindale

Just tossed this into the "Final Review" queue at MEFA so I thought I'd add it here, too.  Well done, Gwidhiel!  I know you have other writing priorities in "real life" at the present, but I'll shamelessly say that I am chomping at the bit for more of Don't Explain.

------------------ 

[Don't Explain] is a sly title for a novel-in-progress which in fact explains much.  Gwidhiel is a newcomer to Tolkienian fan fiction, but in this story, she demonstrates her considerable knowledge of Tolkien's world.  She offers an extraordinarily insightful treatment of the family dynamics of the House of Finwë.  Although such family dynamics have been the subject of other stories, [Don't Explain] shines because of the beautifully crafted portraits of the women -- wives, sisters, aunts and daughters -- whose lives were entwined with Finwë, the family patriarch, most notably Indis, Findis, Galadriel and Miriel Serindë. 

Prompted by the reunion of her grandchildren who have either been reincarnated or returned from Middle-earth, Indis, the protagonist, seeks to heal the wounds of her living family, but most critically, herself.  Accompanied by daughter Findis and granddaughter Galadriel, she seeks counsel from Estë and Irmo and thence to Vairë's workshop.  In her quest to heal, Indis discovers hard truths about her own motivations and complicity in what transpired when Finwë sought permission from the Valar to wed her.

Gwidhiel's women are marvelous -- all rich, multi-faceted characters.  Indis herself is a compelling character, determined to seek her own healing, and open to other avenues of thought.  I am especially taken with Findis, who is no more than a name in the Shibboleth of Fëanor.  Findis here is a fully realized person who sees the world in nuanced shades of gray, an independent woman with her own distinctive viewpoints who has obviously acted as her mother's sounding board.  Findis, as the eldest child of Indis and Finwë, brings forth welcome sympathetic treatment of her older (half) brother, Fëanáro. 

Gwidhiel builds the story well.  [Don't Explain] is not a thriller or an adventure, but it nonetheless is a digital page-turner.  When reading the story, I always had "what will happen next?"  "How will X react to Y?" questions that pulled me along.

[Don't Explain] is an intelligent, introspective WIP, and I can't help but imagine it as an independent film in an "art house" cinema!  I look forward to forthcoming chapters.

 

Pandemonium, thanks -- your articulate and insightful review makes me very glad I've taken a stab at writing fanfiction, and it makes me impatient to get on with the "real life" obligations you've alluded to so that I can finish this story.  Believe it or not, I didn't set out to create a portrait of the female members of the House of Finwë -- I just wanted to shed some light on Míriel.  But as Tolkien intertwined her fate with Indis's, I found I couldn't' get at one without the other. 

The title for Don't Explain is from an old Billie Holiday song, which I was listening to repeatedly on the new Cat Power album a few months ago, when the ideas about Míriel that had been kicking around in my head for a long time coalesced into a narrative.  I think Míriel's story -- at least this part of it -- is just about complete now.  One or two more chapters.

But I think Indis may surprise us all, including herself, by undertaking a new, unprecedented revolution in Valinor, with Findis backing her up.  That might have to wait until the dissertation is done!

While stories driven more heavily by dialogue than by action can sometimes be a tedious read, that particlular narrative style lends itself very well to this story. You do well in breaking the dialogue with guesture and physical expression however subtle or not the action might be, and the dialogue itself is well articulated and very interesting. You explore a very heavy subject matter for which Tolkien gave little explaination and do it very well.

I am sad to see how long it has been since the story has been updated, specifically since you are well into its telling. I hope that you will find the inspiration or resolve to complete it someday.

I really like how complex you make all the interpersonal relationships between everyone.

I escpecially liked the story with Feanaro and Findis right after Nolofinwe's birth. With Findis and Lalwen I couldn't figure out why Feanaro would see Nolofinwe as his rival, if there was an older sibling. This, though, presents a really interesting reason! Anyway, Findis' reaction, following Feanaro and yelling that she already had a brother, was heart-breaking and adorable! I really like it.

This is really insighful into each character's point of view. Even characters like Celeborn, who are only mentioned, seem really fleshed out. The story Galadirel told about him and Findarato was great! That seems like the perfect response for Celeborn to make, haha. Also, the idea that even Feanaro was sometimes confused by his father's unwavering support was interesting. The portrayals of the Valar, especially Nienna (and her habit of hiding her face,) are nice as well. As is Miriel's friendship with the Maiar of Mandos!

Anyway, I'll stop rambling now... Great story!!