I Ain't Got No Body by IgnobleBard

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Fanwork Notes

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A silly fic Oshun made me post.

Fanwork Information

Summary:

Glorfindel can't seem to stay out of Mandos.

Major Characters: Glorfindel, Mandos

Major Relationships:

Artwork Type: No artwork type listed

Genre: Humor

Challenges:

Rating: Adult

Warnings: Character Death
Chapters: 1 Word Count: 669
Posted on 5 June 2008 Updated on 5 June 2008

This fanwork is complete.

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

Comments

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I think it is a scream and very clever. I think my favorite line is "it's a little tight in crotch." That is so funny. And the response to it as well. Those lines and the straw episode. Using Fingon as the punch-line there cracks me up every time I read it. Sorry if I embarrassed you by making you post it. If you didn’t want to share, you should have written such an hilarious, irreverent piece.

My laptop's monitor is now Jackson Pollocked with today's coffee. This is -- in a word -- hootworthy. "Looking boffo" (I love that term) and the Tapestry Accident sent me over th edge.

I'm glad oshun convinced you to post this.  This is a perfectly hilarious addition to your comic compendium of "The Unbearable Smugness of Being (Fëanor)," "Texas Gay Boy..." "Elven Legends," and "A Boy and His Lob," all of which have done happy damage to my computer's monitor.

All right, time to get the cleaning solution... 

Oh dear, I am not sure if I can point out what the best part is... from the bodychamber thing to a sort of CPR where Fëar are being put back in the body, it all had me giggling madly. I love this concept and it's just once more so well executed!

Oshun nominated it already for the mefa's, but that was my first thought after I read it :) Congrats! 

 

Ok, I did already review this on fanfiction.net, but I couldn’t help reading it again... and it’s just as funny the second time.  You were quite creative with thinking up ways for him to die.  My favorite bits were probably when he said “It’s a little tight in the crotch,” and the ending – “Ever try to feed jerky to a Warg?”  Ingenious, truly.  :D

I wanted to leave a copy of your MEFA review on here so you had it with the story =)

 

I think it is safe to say that Ignoble Bard is carving out his own path in the Silmarillion humor category. After reading his hysterical 'The Unbeatable Smugness of Being Feanor', I knew he had a somewhat twisted sense of humor (Which I LOVE btw) and this story did not disappoint. Its rare to find someone who writes so well and at the same time is so dang funny! He is the George Carlin of the Simarillion Fanfiction. Writing about Glorfindel's death, repeated death rather, was perfect - made the elf lord seem a little less perfect. And not many of his deaths were something to be proud of either. I keep thinking of mother's warnings about 'we can't have nice things'. Apparently wtih Glorfindel he 'can't have a great body'. Even the title is hysterical - I keep hearing the song in my head!

Wow, Alassante, this is awesome! Thanks for your comments and thanks for your vote. It's kind of overwhelming and touching that this story is getting such a good response. I can't thank you enough. The comparison to George Carlin is a welcome compliment as well, especially in light of his recent passing. I very much appreciate that. "We can't have nice things" ROFL My mom used to say the same to us. I guess it was true, we were pretty rambuctious. I didn't know if anyone would remember the song. I'm glad you do. :-)

Aren't all the plants and animals ever represented in Valinor? lol I liked the idea of Namo tying to find ways to relax and Glorfindel popping up and disturbing him. I've known a few people like that. Always calling when you're in the shower or whatever. Thanks for commenting. I really appreciate it.