The Condensed Silmarillion by Cheeky

Thank Eru, The Son's of Feanor Are Back!

Thank Eru. The Son's of Feanor Are Back!

Dior hadn't been king of Doriath all that long when a silent grey elf arrived for him with a parcel. Turns out the parcel was the Silmaril necklace and Dior knew this must mean Beren and Lúthien were dead. There was no way Lúthien was giving up that necklace alive.

So he put it on and magically appeared as the fairest being in all the land.

This went to his head rather.

So one day the Son's of Feanor were hanging out when news of Dior's overinflated ego reached them. A heated discussion followed.

"Come on Maedhros," the younger ones said, "We can't let him get away with this let's go get it back."

"Wait, wait," Maedhros was ever the voice of reason and since the Battle of Unnumbered Tears had rather been put off fighting,
"I will send him a pleasantly worded letter. I am sure he will see sense."

And so he did.

Dear Dior,

Hope all is well, Our condolences about your parents, ( not that we liked them all that much........especially Celegorm,) Anyway I am sure you are most eager to return our Silmaril to us and it has just slipped your mind with the funeral arrangements. 
That's quite ok, we look forward to receiving it in return mail.

Yours Maedhros........and the others.

They waited and waited and waited but Dior never answered. ( told you he was an idiot.)

Still Maedhros wasn't all that keen to get involved in fisticuffs.

So Curufin and Caranthir starting working on Celegorm.

"Come on brother, you don't want to let him get away with this! Remember Huan, remember how his parents killed Finrod !" 

Celegorm was torn, he did remember Huan the super strong talking dog who never bothered to talk to him.
"But we can't. Maedhros doesn't want to." And Celegorm only ever wanted to do what Maedhros would do.

"He's still shell shocked from losing Fingon." the other brothers said, "He WOULD have done it.....Maedhros would never have let this go unanswered. It's what the old Maedhros would have done!"

Celegorm didn't know what to do, Did he do what Maedhros would do.......or what the old Maedhros would have done? The more he thought about it the more confused he got.

The others wouldn't let up.

"It will be good for him to get out more, a trip to Doriath is just what he needs!"

They had a point Celegorm thought. Maedhros was in desperate need of some grief counselling. They had searched far and wide for a dragon to help him but to no avail. Perhaps another kinslaying was just what he needed?

In the end he caved to pressure and joined the throng of brothers clamouring for vengeance.

They all rode out to Doriath, Maedhros hoping a personal face to face chat with Dior would sort this out, maybe their letter had been lost in the mail or something? Surely no one could be so stupid as to fail to reply to the Son's of Feanor on Silmaril business?
Yes they could. This was Beren and Lúthien's son remember!

It didn't go well. Especially for Celegorm.
Nothing ever went right for Celegorm.
Dior killed him, first in a long list of deaths. Curufin, Caranthir, Dior and Nimloth had joined the list by the end of it all.  

And Elwing and the Silmaril got away. 

Somehow poor Celegorm once again ended up getting all the blame. They even managed to pin Dior's missing sons on him. He was dead before they went missing people! 
Maedhros did his best to try and find them but failed which obviously left him with a longstanding and unfulfilled need to parent twins who's names started with El. We will just add that in to his other multiple pre-existing psychological problems.

When Noldor historians came pointing fingers later the surviving brothers all stood back hands in the air,
"It wasn't us....It was all Celegorm's idea!" 

Well except Maedhros who was too upset by it all to say anything.